It's been a long day and one that proved to be quite stressful. The boys haven't been getting along very well lately and I realize that's a normal thing but it makes the Autism related challenges even more challenging. The fighting and bickering adds an additional layer of frustration as well. .
I went walking pretty early today and holy shit was it cold out. I was caught off guard because I woke up to snow on the ground.
It was 24 °F but I went anyway and pushed through a bit over 3 miles.
Anyway, I needed to get that done because State Farm was sending a second adjuster over to survey the damage to our house from the storm in September.
I've been really stressed out over this because we have a fucking hole in the side of our house that leads right into our crawl space on the third floor. It needs to get repaired but we needed the payout in order to do that.
Our finances are not good right now and I can't afford to pay anything out of pocket. I'm already eating the $1,000.00 deductible and frankly, it's not sitting well.
The adjuster was really cool and it took about an hour or so. I won't know where we are until I receive the updated estimate and that may take a few days. I am hopeful that we'll be able to get the repairs done. Even if it's just the worst of the damage that gets fixed.
I also realized this afternoon, how desperately I needed to go grocery shopping. I've been putting this off because I'm having to sorta rob Peter to pay Paul at this point. While I had some cash in the bank, it was earmarked for other things. I haven't wanted to face the reality of where we're at, so I've been avoiding this trip. It's not a super mature approach and it solves nothing.
It is what it is and I'm doing the best I can, playing the cards I've been dealt. At the end of the day, we have to eat.
I spent more than I was hoping to but really only got what we needed and what the kids needed for school. This has caused a great deal of stress and anxiety because I know it's going to come back around and bite me. At the same time, it's not going to bite me today, so I can worry about that tomorrow.
One of these things in isolation might be manageable but everything all at once is quite overwhelming.
The holidays are right around the corner and I don't have a clue as to how I'm going to pull that off. All I can really do at this point is try to secure more advertising gigs and set as much of that aside for Christmas as I possibly can.
I'm not intending to sound like it's the end of the world. It really isn't. I always figure something out and we manage to stay afloat, even if only by the skin of our teeth. It could always be worse and I'm totally grateful for the work I've had come in.
I'm getting ready to call it a night. I'm so stressed out that I'm clenching my teeth and now they're sore. I don't do it in my sleep cause I always feel better in the AM. I'm giving up on the rest of the day and heading to bed.
I'm very much looking forward to a clean slate in the morning. We all need a fresh start, even if that fresh start is only on an emotional level.
