Lizze and I might have the entire night to ourselves. I'm not sure what we're going to do with our free time but I at least a tiny bit of walking will be part of it. I want to finish the month strong.
Money is really tight and a huge source stress/anxiety. Now we have at least a $1,000 deductible to come up with related to our homeowners claim in regards to the storm damage to our house, garage, yard and tree (see *It's pretty bad but thank God no one was hurt*).
Our car is really beyond repair and things like groceries or other everyday expenses aren't getting any cheaper.
We're also taking Zane, one of our service ferrets to the vet in the morning because something isn't right with him. That wasn't planned for but it's part of being a pet parent. The ferrets do so much for our kids with Autism and they are a priority.
Writing is how I provide for my family but when I'm struggling with depression, writing is so much harder for me. Deriving an income from this site becomes more difficult when writing becomes more difficult.
When you're an Autism and/or Special Needs parent, your life revolves around meeting the never ending stream of needs that your child/children have. It's demanding, constant, endless, overwhelming, heartbreaking, exhausting, difficult, challenging, frustrating, emotionally draining, and sometimes demoralizing.
It takes a toll.
Sometimes, I desperately crave a sense of normalcy, even if only for a brief moment. I love my family, challenges and all. I wouldn't change or trade them for anything in the world but I'm human. Wanting to feel *normal *is well, normal and certainly nothing to be ashamed of.
Part of feeling a sense of normalcy, is Lizze and I doing something together, when we have the opportunity, even if it's a sacrifice.
Tonight we have an opportunity for a little normalcy and how we chose to imbrace that opportunity remains to be seen.
Maybe we will go to dinner or use some movie passes we have to catch a movie that's *not kid friendly*. Perhaps we order a pizza and watch somethibg on Netflix. I don't know what we're going to do but I'd really, really like to get out of the house for a little while tonight.
We desperately need a little normalcy in our lives right now and these opportunities don't come around very often.
I'm not even talking anything fancy or super expensive. It's not so much what we do but instead that we're at least doing something for ourselves and to nurture our marriage.
Still, it's not necessarily the most fiscally responsible thing to do but maintaining our sanity is crucial to everyone's success.
Lizze and I almost never go anywhere together, especially without the kids. Sometimes the importance of going to dinner and being able to pretend for just a little while that everything is okay, justifies the expense.
As Autism and/or Special Needs parents, we often hate the word *normal. *At the same time, we can desperately crave a sense of normalcy in our lives and there's nothing wrong with that.
