I haven't had the energy to talk about this but it's become a significant problem and it's something we are struggling with.
Elliott has struggled with anxiety for as long as we can remember. It's one of his comorbid diagnoses to go along with Autism and ADHD. Elliott worries about everything and having Autism has made that much more impactful.
Like many kids on the Autism Spectrum, Elliott *perseverates. *That basically means that his brain puts thoughts on repeat and he literally can't stop thinking about whatever that is.* *He's always been this way. The truly unfortunate thing is that when those thoughts on repeat are about things that terrify him, like say, having bloodwork done or getting a shot, it's simply too much for him to handle.
We've been working on this for years but haven't found a way to help him work through this.
Unfortunately for Elliott and subsequently all of us as well, he needs to have bloodwork done. In order to do that, he needs to have his blood drawn.
He's been able to avoid bloodwork for the past couple of years because it had been necessary. It's now become necessary and to say that he isn't coping well, would be the understatement of the century.
The plan was to have his labs done today while he and Emmett are having the ADHD meds check with the pediatrician. Elliott knew this because we won't surprise him with it. Surprising him would not be a good thing because he would never trust us again. In some cases, it's best to not say anything until the last possible second. That's not the right approach with Elliott.
He was so upset Monday night that we decided to pull the plug on having it done today. It's important but it's not time sensitive. We thought that we could discuss this with Dr. Pattie and find a way to help Elliott through this without having to literally drag him to the lab.
Elliott's been having nightmares and that's only if he even sleeps at all. He's even telling us he's going to run away. He's not going to run away and we have our house completely monitored by our Vivint Smart Home system, so he can't go anywhere without us knowing anyway. Still, I'm making sure the system is armed because I'd rather be safe than sorry.
We all sat down and spoke with Dr. Pattie about this and Elliott was hysterical. He's just so far over the edge, there's not a whole lot of rational thought taking place. He's totally fight or flight and it took a considerable amount of time to even touch on the subject without him freaking out.
There wasn't a whole lot accomplished but we are trying a slightly different approach. We want him to feel as much in control as he can. This has to get done and we're saying that it has to be within the next thirty days. We want him to decide when to have this done because that way he's choosing to do this rather than having it done to him. It's a fine line but like I said, we're trying a different approach.
Elliott wants to get it done and over with but he's too afraid, especially if we tell him when it's happening.
Having taken this approach, Elliott is now considering whether or not he wants to do this today while we're at the pediatricians office. This is progress because before we approached it this way, he would even think about it without hyperventilating. Now he feels a bit more in control and he knows this is important. The fact that he's thinking about doing this today, all on his own, is a ignorance step for him.
Obviously, this isn't open ended and we will make it happen if this goes in too long. We also wouldn't do things like this if it were something critical to his health and well-being.
Our goal is more long term. We're trying to teach him ways of working through things like this on his own. It's not easy but we did make some progress. We'll see how today goes. There are no expectations and we will be very matter of fact about whatever he decides to do. I have a feeling though, he's going to go through with it and get it done so he can put it behind him.
We have to think outside the box because our kids don't fit any mold. They think and experience life in very unique ways. We have to be creative to make things work sometimes.
