I love my kids, I love my kids.  Having made that clear, I’m going to admit to you all that they are driving me completely bonkers today.  They are fighting over absolutely everything. 

Perhaps they are both overstimulation from the Easter holiday still, I don’t know. 

What I do know is that their constant fighting and bickering is driving me closer and closer to my breaking point.

Lizze and I wanted to take the boys and get their hair cut today.  I don’t see that happening now. 

I’m pretty sure that we would be out of our minds to make that attempt on a day like today.  Naps aren’t in anyone’s future either.

It’s still too cold and the neighborhood too dangerous to let the boys play outside in the yard.  Even with it being fenced in, there are just too many scary things going on around us, to take that chance. 

Later in the week, it’s supposed to be warmer and we should be able to get them to the playground a few times.

It’s no secret that my family is in a pretty bad place.  I don’t always go into just how bad things are but they’re pretty bad and I’m enormously stressed out, as I try to keep us moving forward.

I think for right now, there is just too much stress in the air. Even if Lizze and I do our best to hide it from the boys, they still feel it and it affects them….. ASD kids may not always understand the emotions they’re exposed to but they certainly feel them.

Frustration sets in because I have to get some work done and I can’t because I need to constantly be on top of things with the boys.  Because of the whole Gavin thing, our parents are tide up with him and are unable to help us with the others. 

Lizze does the very best she can but she’s in so much pain, all the time.

We’re lucky to have such helpful and supportive parents  but that’s all that we have. 

Still it’s something to be grateful for and it’s more than what many other people get.

Life as this special needs family is not easy.  I don’t often use the word impossible but many times it truly feels like survival is impossible, unless we get some help. Unfortunately, there just isn’t much help out there, either that, or our challenges are such that we just don’t fit anywhere.

Frustrated….  🙁

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