Something Lizze and I both failed to consider is whether or not Gavin is suffering from delirium. When he was at the Cleveland Clinic last year that's what they diagnosed him with. They told us it's a life threatening condition. I don't know how we overlooked that. We got caught up and focused on the hallucinations and wanting to stop those for him that we failed to see the larger picture.
Gavin sees someone at Dr. R's office today and we will figure out what needs to happen. As much as I mentally prepared for this conversation I'm not ready to have it.
Putting aside for a second what Gavin may need, what about the rest of the family. How will we survive with this added pressure? How can we be two places at once. Dividing and conquering is no longer a realistic option. If Lizze goes with him and stays then she can't take her meds. That will have a devastating impact on her. She can't physically watch the kids by herself either because again she couldn't take her meds. If no one stays then we will be driving back and forth almost everyday and we CANNOT afford that either. There's also the physical and emotional toll. As I said Lizzie will probably have to stop at least some of her meds either way. That will disrupt the fine balance she maintains with fibromylagia (if you you even want to call that a balance).
Then we have to guilt factor....and whether it should be or not it weighs heavy on us.
2:45pm we go in to figure out what we are supposed to do. We need everyone on board to make this as painless for everyone as possbile.....
Please say a prayer today around that time.......
-lost and tired
