Read more about the article This is what withdrawing from #Paxil is doing to me
Depression Confessions / Depression Management / Medications / My thoughts

This is what withdrawing from #Paxil is doing to me

I wanted to touch base and let you guys know where I've been. Since last Thursday, I've been really, really struggling both physically and emotionally. I was doing pretty good, or so I thought. For most of the last 90 days or so, I was going okay. I would feel changes each time my dose was reduced but for the most part, I adjusted well. When I took my final dose last Thursday, I thought I was going to be free. Instead, I find myself struggling more than I ever have before. To be clear, I'm not struggling with Depression, the Fisher Wallace Stimulator I'm using is helping out a great deal on that end. The problem I'm having now is how my body is reacting to no longer having…

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March 15, 2018
Read more about the article Some sad news about our dog
Cats / Maggie / My thoughts

Some sad news about our dog

Maggie is our roughly twelve year old English Staffy. We've had her since she was two years old and she's the best dog anyone could ask for. We have so many amazing memories with her and she's a loved member of our family. Sadly, I fear we're reaching a point in time where we may have some very difficult and painful decisions to make. Maggie is almost completely blind and deaf. She got tumors in several places, including places where they've already been removed. She's becoming very difficult to manage because she doesn't respond most of the time and just wanders around aimlessly, when we take her outside to use the bathroom. Tonight, she fell down an entire flight of step, only stopping when she slammed into the fire place.…

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March 13, 2018
Read more about the article IMPORTANT UPDATE: My nightmarish withdrawal from #Paxil has taken an unexpected turn
Depression Management / Medications / My thoughts

IMPORTANT UPDATE: My nightmarish withdrawal from #Paxil has taken an unexpected turn

Yesterday, I told you that Gavin's appointment with Dr. Reynolds went fine. What I didn't tell you was that I had a chance to talk to him about my current struggles with coming off of Paxil. I also wanted to update you all as well because I think it's been a little while since a more detailed update has been written. I took my last dose of Paxil last Thursday. I was taking 40 mg/day and over the last three months, I've slowly weaned off the Paxil, under medical supervision. This has been a nightmare at times and survivable at others. The middle part of this journey wasn't too bad because was I beginning to use the Fisher Wallace Stimulator and that has helped to take the edge off by…

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March 13, 2018
Read more about the article I was able to give Gavin his #Clozapine tonight
Clozapine / Gavin / My thoughts

I was able to give Gavin his #Clozapine tonight

We were able to get Gavin's Clozapine refilled today. I had to make a few calls but the script was ready for pickup at 7:30 PM tonight. That's definitely a step ahead of what it's been for the last few months. I'm not sure if the new process we are trying with the doctors office is responsible for this pleasant turn of events or if it was the new bloodwork order, with very specific instructions. Maybe the stars aligned and everyone simply did their jobs. I guess the only reason I can is because I'd like to repeat this every week. It's a huge relief when I don't have so battle to get his lab results sent and his script refilled. All that truly matters right now is that I'm…

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March 12, 2018
Read more about the article This morning was all about Gavin
Gavin / My thoughts

This morning was all about Gavin

I spent the morning dealing with Gavin related appointments. He had an appointment with Dr. Reynolds and then needed to get his bloodwork done. We had about an hour long wait before we were finally seen by the good doctor. That wasn't too bad of a wait and I wouldn't have cared otherwise but I'm not feeling well this morning. One of the topics discussed was the nightmare it's been to get his Clozapine refilled. Frankly, I don't know who's to blame anymore because the lab points the finger at the pharmacy and the pharmacy points the finger right back at the lab. Dr. Reynolds issued a new STAT bloodwork order and made it very clear that the lab needs to fax the results to the pharmacy immediately. I don't…

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March 12, 2018
Read more about the article I hate feeling powerless
Autism Parenting Struggles / Emmett John / My thoughts

I hate feeling powerless

It's now 1:47 AM and Emmett has just now fallen asleep. We've been trying to help him for hours upon hours. He has a really bad tummy ache and feels like he's going to puke. This is stressful for any kid but it's especially so with a kid like Emmett. To make things even worse for the poor kid, he also seems to be hitting a fever flare because he's getting sores in his mouth again. I don't know what the deal is with these tummy aches but they are consistent, especially when school is approaching. He's not making this up and he's clearly in distress but the cause remains a mystery. My personal opinion is that we're dealing with a side effect of his extreme anxiety. He struggles with…

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March 12, 2018
Read more about the article Even Daddies make mistakes and need to apologize
Autism Parenting Advice / Inspirational Posts / My thoughts

Even Daddies make mistakes and need to apologize

Today was one of those days where I feel like a parenting failure. There wasn't one specific thing that contributed to me feeling like this but rather a culmination of things. The boys were being the boys. They were loud, hyper and testing my patience. Gavin was being Gavin and that means he was talking non-stop about his games or the games he's saving up for. He's become much more sensitive lately and he reacts to stress in a not so positive way. That is very frustrating for me. I just didn't have the patience that I should have had today. I was short with the kids on several occasions and I let their behavioral challenges get to me. No ones perfect, least of all me. I've had a difficult…

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March 11, 2018