Just one of the unique challenges that #specialneeds parents face

Gavin had a little mini emergency tonight. He had us worried for a little while but seems to be fine now. In the middle of dinner, he got a really bad migraine, I gave him Motrin and told him to go lay down. It's really hard to tell what's going on with him because he is unable to answer any questions that could help me know how to better help him. I asked him if light or sound makes his pain worse and couldn't answer that. I asked him to be more specific about where the pain is and he couldn't really do that either. This was taken pre-covid Lizze was brought in via phone to help because she lives with migraines on the daily and she might have more…

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I’m really nervous about this

By the time you read this, we will likely be on the other side of this particular situation. In the morning, we have someone coming to service our furnace. Something is very wrong with it and it needs to get done or we won't have any heat. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal but since COVID, nothing is not a big deal anymore. I reached out to some medical experts I know to figure out the safest approach to having this done. After chatting for a little bit, it was concluded that assuming they actually wear a mask like I was promised they would, and we stay as far away as we can, while wearing our own masks, the risk should be low. The current plan is to have…

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Fingers crossed that I sleep tonight

You know what? It's actually been a pretty good day. Obviously, it wasn't perfect or stress free but I don't think those days even exist. I feel like we made some progress around the house and for the most part, the kids got along with each other. I'm always grateful for that and it helps to maintain a positive tone for the day. It's amazing how something so simple can change the demeanor in the house. I didn't get a whole lot of work done but I've written twice and that hasn't happened in forever. That's big for me and it's progress. This week I need to focus on finishing up episode 39 and before Wednesday. That should be relatively easy, assuming the boys let me have the time needed…

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It’s 2:40 am and I’m too stressed to sleep

It's been a rough day in our house. My tank is pretty much on empty and the kids have been such a handful lately. I'm exhausted and coming up short in the patience department. Currently, it's almost 3am and I still can't fall asleep because it's been such a stressful day. I can't seem to shut my brain off. The kids have been at each other's throats all day. Emmett and Gavin were fighting and I was done with it. I sent them downstairs to call their mom and have her help them resolve whatever they were fighting over. It didn't end well and made things infinitely worse but Lizze did what she could from a distance. The kids needed a physical intervention and that of course, can't be done…

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I’m trying to have a better day today

I'm feeling a little better after a halfway decent night's sleep. Emmett had a nightmare and burst into my room in the middle of the night. Once he glued himself to my arm, sleep went out the window. So far, my day is off to a good start. The house is relatively quiet and I'm watching the news for a little while. The boys and I went out for a short hike before dark yesterday. I mentioned that in the previous post. I know it was a more difficult one to read but trust me, it sucked equally as bad actually living it. What I wanted to do was pick things up a bit and share some of the pics from yesterday's nature outing. I really try to be positive…

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I’ve had a horrible day and I’m so over 2020

Today has been straight up, one of the most horrible days I've had in a long time. I'm so overwhelmed and feel like I'm drowning. Sometimes I feel like I'm totally broken and just can't put myself back together. I try so hard to be the best father I can be. I'm not perfect by any stretch of the imagination and that should be painfully obvious by now. If it's not, I don't know what to tell you. From a distance, it may look to other people in my situation, that I've got it all together but I promise I don't. There's never really been a time in my life that I haven't been able to rise the occasion. I may not always succeed but I'll be damned if I…

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That’s what makes you awesome

I don't know if you're new here or not but in case you are, you should know that I see a therapist every Wednesday. I feel like it's important to share that because there's too much stigma surrounding therapy. My therapist is awesome and she's helping me to deal with everything I've been through.  I feel like I'm doing okay. I've moved on from my marriage ending and I no longer carry that pain around. Therapy has really helped with that. Unfortunately, some things can't be learned in therapy and are only learned through life experience. I've not written like this in a long time but I just feel like I need to dig down and put my thoughts into words. There's a lot of stress associated with being an…

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I can’t think of a fucking title for this

I've accomplished a whole lot of nothing today. I know that I probably should care or at least feel a little guilty but I don't. I mean, I spent some time with my kids and did actually mulch the leaves again. I suppose that's my claim to fame for the moment and I'm cool with that. This week should be quite interesting because I'm scheduled to record my final interview for season 3 of the pod and I'll wrap things up with 40 episodes. That's actually quite an accomplishment and the pod continues to grow every week. Anyway, I have a few episodes left in post but nothing new scheduled after this week. I'm kinda excited about that. The timing is perfect because Emmett's new school schedule starts this week…

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