In pain but staying positive

It's been a pretty good day, all things considered. I got a lot accomplished and I feel good about that. I've been in a decent amount of pain today and it's gotten worse as the day wears on. Have you ever experienced pain that just sorta made you nauseated? That's how I'm feeling at the moment. I've been through far worse but this still kinda sucks. I'm so impressed by my kids because they are all doing so well under the circumstances. Everyone is being extra helpful and I really appreciate that. I'm so grateful for all their help. Next week I will begin recording again. There are some important topics that I hope will be of benefit. At this point, I'm taking on COVID, self-care, stuff specifically geared for…

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Surgery went well and I humbly thank my friends at the @ClevelandClinic

I really appreciate all the concern. It took a bit longer to get this out than I had originally planned because I'm moving a little slower than I thought I would be, but I wanted to let you all know how I'm doing. I'm in between meetings at the moment so I will make this super quick. Yesterday I had surgery at the Cleveland Clinic to remove a cyst that was right in the center of my back, along my spine. This was elective in the sense that it wasn't giving me any problems yet but it would become problematic if left alone. I simply chose to deal with it before it became a problem. The surgery went great. It's a surreal experience to have your back operated on while…

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I’m more than the sum of my flaws

I'm sitting here today sorta going through the highlights of my last 43 years of life. I'm going to be very honest and say that my life feels like it's been a mixed bag, but I think that's how life is realistically supposed to be. There are highs and lows throughout this journey, and our job is to ride the waves. I feel like I've done that for the most part. So much has happened during my 42nd year and it's helped mold me into the man I currently am. I want to look back on some of the changes that have occurred in my life and remember the what those experiences have taught me. I'd even like to glance forward and see what 43 will have to offer. There…

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I think 43 going to be my best year yet

For those who don't know, I turn 43 years old on Tuesday of this week. I used to hate the idea of getting older because it scared me. I've since learned to embrace life in all its stages and live them to their fullest. Turning 43 isn't upsetting to me all and it feels good not to be dreading my birthday. In fact, 43 looks to be my best year ever and I'm excited for all the new adventures. Over the weekend, I went out to dinner for my birthday, and it was amazing. The kids are doing great being back at school and that's awesome. I don't really have any plans for Tuesday aside from sneaking in one last workout before my surgery on Wednesday. I'm a little nervous…

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Transitions Suck

I had a really early start to my day and it was totally worth it. Sometimes I need some motivation to get up earlier than I would otherwise, but I'm always glad I did. I want to start my days eariler whenever I can. That's a goal going forward. The school year has officially begun and we got off without a hitch. Both boys are masked and vaccinated. Please do the same as soon as it becomes available. Let's keep each other and our families safe. Starting a new school year isn't nearly as stressful as it once was but that doesn't mean it's stress free, because it's not.  As the kids have gotten older and gained more independence, I don't need to be as heavily involved as I…

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Being a single parent is tough but I’m feeling accomplished today and here’s why

It's been a fantastic day and while it wasn't perfect, I feel like it definitely belongs in the win column. The rest of my labs finally came back in, everything is perfect, and I'm grateful. I wasn't really worried but I'm not a huge fan of the unknown. I saw my doctor this week and she was really proud of me. She says I'm going great and to keep it up. That felt really good because it's been a journey to get where I am. Don't get me wrong, I still have room for improvement, for for the moment I'm celebrating the victory. I spent the morning working on some freelance stuff and next weeks podcast episode. I think it will be next week anyway. I'm on somewhat of a…

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I need to make some decisions this week

It looks like this week is going include some rushing around getting everything done for school that I should done already. Both the boys need new shoes and I think we're gonna take care of that today. I've gone through all of their clothes and I think we're okay for the moment. Sensory challenges make this so much harder, especially for Emmett. He is incredibly sensitive to things that touch his skin and he doesn't tolerate pants very well. He prefers shorts but he needs pants for the colder Ohio weather. It difficult to find pants that he will find comfortable enough to wear. Anyway, the point is, it's challenging and I'm grateful that I don't have to look for too much because it will be easier on him. I'm…

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I get overwhelmed sometimes

There are times when I feel like a total failure. I've talked about before and I'm sure I'll be talking about it again in the future. I've been fighting this overwhelming feeling of being a failure recently. I know that I do the best I can but sometimes it's just not enough. I feel like I'm drowning in that feeling right now. I've been interviewed many times over the years and I'm always asked about what I find most difficult about being a special needs parent. My answer is always the same and it goes like this. One of the hardest things for me is that I wake up every single morning knowing that even on my very best day, I'm not enough. That sounds super depressing and frankly, it…

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