Insomnia Archives - Page 345 of 353

The Good, Bad and Ugly: The Good

Now that we've talked about the ugly and gotten that over with, let's balance things out with the good.. ☺ I'll begin by sharing that the boys both had amazing days at school. Elliott lost a point and ended up having a green day instead of a teal day, whatever the fuck that means. Green seems like it would be a good color. Either way, it was a good day. After the boys got home and I was feeling better, we ran some errands and went to CiCi's Pizza for dinner as a family. That doesn't happen very often at all and it was really nice. The absolute highlight of my day took place after we got home from dinner and the errands we had to run. Emmett has a report…

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February 2, 2017

My thoughts

The Good, Bad and Ugly: The Ugly

As days go, yesterday was a mixed bag of good, bad and ugly. This post and the following two will each explore things that happened yesterday. Let's start with the ugly and just rip the bandage off right away. It was about mid-morning (9:00 am-ish), when out of nowhere, I got really sick. I don't know what it was but it was horrible. I had to go back to bed. I had reflux really bad and when I would fall asleep, acid would creep up causing me to wake up, unable to breathe. This happened a few times, even sleeping propped up and it was fucking scary because I was gasping for air. I had to aggressively clear my throat in order to be able to breathe again. Emmett used…

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February 2, 2017

Depression / My thoughts

The 3 MAJOR things that have contributed to my depression

It's been a really, really long day for me and I apologize for not getting to this sooner. I wanted to update you on how my first solo therapy appointment went today. I have been managing my depression pretty well for most of my life. I take my meds and talked to our longtime family therapist when I feel the need. Lately, that hasn't been enough. Those of you who've been around for a long time can probably tell when I struggle more because it impacts my writing. I've had a few concerned readers urge me to get my own therapist but what I was doing at the time, was working for me. Having said that, I've struggling more lately and after hearing what everyone had to say and talking…

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February 1, 2017

Depression / My thoughts

I made a very big decision in regards to my #depression

This will be a super quick post but important nonetheless. I've been very open about my struggles with depression. I'm not ashamed and I truly hope doing so helps at least one other person to open up about their struggle with depression. I made a major decision about how I'm managing my depression. Some of you will be happy to hear this and others will just be gaining insight. This has been a sort of hot button issue between myself and some of my concerned readers. For many years, I've taken the same approach to my depression management and its worked for the most part. However, after some soul searching and discussions with my wife, I've decided that I will begin seeing someone outside of our family therapist. This will…

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January 31, 2017

My thoughts

This felt like an accomplishment today

The boys both had really good days at school today. Gavin's infusion went off without a hitch and aside from his joints popping out of socket, he's had a good day as well. A large part of my awake time today was spent rebuilding my server. You may not know this but I donate server space to a couple Autism related sites, one of which was met with an exploit that spread to another site. It took some time, patience and a bit more patience but I was able to get everything rebuilt, cleaned and back online. I'm actually getting pretty good at managing the server side of things and it felt like an accomplishment when I was done. While it's frustrating when these things come up, it's important for…

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January 31, 2017

My thoughts

Feeling frustrated but determined

I'm pretty frustrated at the moment because I crashed about 10:00 am and slept much longer than I wanted to. I understand that my body clearly needed it but at the same time, life needs more attention than it's been getting. On the positive side, I feel much better and ready to tackle the day. How does one recover from chronic sleep deprivation? You can't make up sleep that was lost but is there a way to regain a healthy sleep wake cycle? Truth be told, my circumstances won't change much in the near future. The medications Lizze is on are very sedative, and while she's still adjusting to the changes, it's always going to make her sleepy to some extent. My goal is to get to bed by 10:00…

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January 30, 2017

Gavin / My thoughts

Poor Gavin’s having some problems

Gavin's not been feeling well lately. It's really strange because it's seemingly random and what doesn't feel well is also. He's complaining about reflux, stomach aches, headaches and pain in his calf. He never seems to have them all together but instead, one at a time. There's no rhyme or reason for these ailments and there isn't much that we can do to help him. Last night he had reflux but woke up in the middle of the night feeling better in one way but worse in another because a stomach ache crept in to take the place of his reflux. So far, he's feeling better and has no complaints. Hopefully, it stays that way.

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January 30, 2017

My thoughts

A chunk of awesome

It was a long night but a pretty great morning. Mondays have traditionally kinda sucked in our house. This morning however, things have gone quite smoothly thus far. Elliott is dressed and ready to go by 7:30 am. The biggest chunk of awesome is thanks to Emmett tolerating his shoes and socks this morning. Props to Lizze for helping to facilitate that chunk of awesome.

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January 30, 2017