I love my kids, but dammit I need a break

I didn't sleep well last night, and that led to us oversleeping this morning. How we start the day has a direct impact on how the day goes, and getting off to a late start isn't a good thing. Having to rush around puts the kids on edge and creates a stressful environment for everyone. We try to avoid mornings like this but sometimes our Google Hub hiccups, and the alarm doesn't go off. An interesting fact about the Google Hub, if your wifi drops, it's completely useless, even as an alarm clock. Always, set a backup. 😉 The kids made it to school, and I took Ruby walking with me in the rain. She lives for these walks each morning, and it's become our thing. While she won't go…

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I didn’t get much work done today but what we did accomplish made a difference

It's been a long day, and I'm exhausted. We had a good deal of running around that needed to be done. My replacement phone finally came in, and we needed to hit the dispensary so Lizze could pick up her medicine. It's still bizarre saying that out loud or even talking about it, but it's been a godsend for her, and I'm grateful for that. Gavin has been a bit trying today. He's extra talkative lately, and I'm trying to be patient, but it's not easy. He's not doing any of this on purpose or to make life difficult. He simply lacks the impulse control needed not to say everything that pops into his head. 😀 We survived the morning and eventually picked the kids up from school before going…

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I’ve been taking #Prozac for about 8 weeks now

I wanted to share a quick update in regards to my ongoing war with Depression. As many of you already know, I've been in a lifelong war with Depression. Recently, I shared that I went back to my doctor because I wasn't coping with life, and I was drowning in negative thoughts. About eight weeks ago, I began taking 20mg of Prozac daily, in conjunction with the Wellbutrin I was already on. I wasn't excited about going back on another antidepressant, but truthfully, the alternative wasn't an option. When I said I was drowning in negative thoughts, I was referring to constant worries about my kids, their future, my health, my wife's health, and literally everything else, all at once. Most of these worries were outside of my control and…

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Oh that’s where all the hand sanitizer went

In our house, we keep hand sanitizer in key locations. The reason for that is that not everyone is mindful of proper hygiene and touching up with some Purell is necessarily a bad thing to do before touching or preparing food. We also keep hand soap in the bathroom and kitchen because that's the preferred method of hand cleansing. Anyway, we go through so much fucking hand sanitizer, and it I'll give you a clue as to why. His name begins with Ga and ends with vin. Mr. Gavin feels the need to use hand sanitizer constantly. As an example, this just happened. I finished my walk and swung by the house to drop Ruby off, as well as pick Gavin up for his bloodwork. He had just left the…

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It’s a race against the weather

This morning is going to be a race against the weather, literally. We have storms blowing in. I have to get the kids to school and get my walking done before they arrive. That's the goal anyway. I also have to get Gavin in for his weekly bloodwork and then pick up my replacement phone at some point, assuming it comes in today. Outside of that, I have reviews to work on and writing to get done. I'm grateful for the work this week and I definitely look forward to getting paid. 😉

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It went much better than I expected

It's been a long day and an emotionally stressful one at that. Gavin had his psychiatrist appointment this morning, and you can read all about what that gifted us with here. What I didn't mention in the above-linked post from earlier was what we were doing with his medication. Someone left a comment asking about that, and I figured I'd address that now. ☺ Long story short, his medications are not changing. His dose of Clozapine is still 300mg and will remain as such. Nothing else is being added, and at this point, I feel that's the best thing. We can always re-evaluate things later. It's important to understand that Clozapine is an end of the road medication and it's only used when nothing else works. Clozapine is the end…

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I feel like we’re killing off the last part of his childhood

Spent a couple of hours with Gavin this afternoon. He had an appointment with his psychiatrist today for a medication follow up. This was in regards to his Clozapine specifically. This was an unexpected fucking emotional rollercoaster for Gavin today. Out of nowhere; he became distraught. When I asked him what was upsetting him, he explained that he's terrified that he's been put on Santa's naughty list because he's killed people while on missions. Super quick background If you're unaware, Gavin is schizophrenic along with everything else. His hallucinations revolve around going on dangerous missions to save the universe from evil. He has a team of superheroes that he leads. Along the way, there are times that he's had to kill evildoers. He was in the waiting room, physically sobbing…

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Why I get to the school an hour before dismissal

One of the reasons I like getting to school an hour early to pick up the boys is because I like the quiet. It's a great time to get some writing done without too much distraction. Another reason I like to arrive an hour early at the school, especially in warmer weather is because it gives me a chance to observe my kids playing outside with their peers. Sometimes it can be hard to pick up on social awkwardness because they're comfortable at home and we're used to everything about them. Sometimes it's just nice to see them playing with their classmates. Making friends can be tough for people with Autism and so it feels good to see them doing good in this area. We all want our kids to…

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