Depression Archives - Page 68 of 323

I’m so grateful for these 3 amazing things that happened yesterday

Admittedly, I had a really really bad day yesterday and I had a difficult time seeing any positives as a result. Last night I had bizarre, divorce related nightmares. It was the kind of nightmares where I woke up suddenly, in a cold sweat. That said, I did sleep some and I'm grateful for that. Part of me feels recharged enough to recognize that we had some positive things sprinkled into our lives yesterday. I want to start the new day by focusing on them. There aren't in any particular order. It's the order my brain is stringing my thoughts together this morning. So, yeah.. Yesterday I took the plunge and made pepperoni rolls more from scratch. I used raw pizza dough and sandwich pepperoni. I made a batch while…

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August 30, 2019

My thoughts

I’ve been screamed at more times than I can f*cking count today and it sucks

I've had a very difficult day today. I've done my best and my best wasn't even close. I'm really, really struggling at this time and it's more difficult than it should be because I'm trying so hard to hide my whatever this is from the kids. They have enough on their plates. Lizze and I are committed to keeping them out of as many grownup issues as possible. The kids are struggling. Elliott was sent home from school today because he wasn't feeling well. He didn't even make it to 9:30 AM before he became so emotionally overwhelmed that he presented with physical symptoms. He had a headache and nausea. QHe looked absolutely miserable and I truly believe that he felt like shit but I also know that he's not…

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August 29, 2019

Bad Days / My thoughts / New Beginnings

I’m a raw nerve today

I've talked about having good days and bad days. I've spoken about healing the open wounds and it's all a process. I thought I was actually doing pretty good until this morning. Today is definitely a bad day for me. It's one of those days where I feel like a raw nerve. Everything is getting to me and I feel like I'm drowning. Elliott came home from school sick. He's not physically ill but is so stressed out that he feels sick just the same. Lizze and I are working together to help him through this. That's absolutely a positive thing but even so, it's not a quick fix. It's a process. I'm so overwhelmed by everything today and not seeing an end in sight. At the same time, I…

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August 29, 2019

My thoughts

I’m all about the path of least resistance today because I’m f*cking exhausted

The boys are up and moving. Everyone's mostly cooperative and I'm very grateful for that. I've been having bad dreams lately and my sleep is not restful, so I appreciate things being a bit easier this morning. My plan is to work around the house today. I really want to get the hallway leading to the basement gutted and cleaned up. It would make getting to and from the basement so much easier. Everything I can do to streamline our lives is a positive thing at this point. I have a meeting this afternoon and I'm not even almost slightly looking forward to it. It's a necessary evil but one I wish wasn't needed. Assuming I survive the meeting and I will, I'll pickup the kids and head home for…

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August 29, 2019

My thoughts

Instead of focusing on my failures, let’s focus on what I got right today

We had a busy day today and while the important things got done, there's a million other things that didn't. I'm currently in the headspace where it's easier to focus on all the things I didn't get done, instead of what I managed to accomplish. It's a bit of depression talking and I know that. While it's not easy and there are plenty of times that I have to actually force myself, it's important that I not lose sight of the positive things going on in my life right now. The reality is that I got both kids to school this morning. That's proving to be difficult thus far because they're both struggling a great deal. I got Elliott to his appointment today and was able to explain to the…

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August 29, 2019

Akron Children's Hospital / Behavioral Health / Elliott / My thoughts

How our trip to @AkronChildrens Hospital went today

We came, we saw, we conquered. Elliott's appointment went as well as expected. Nothing really unexpected came out of today and that's not a bad thing. There are no major medication changes right now because it's best to let the dust settle before we evaluate for any needed changes to his medication or depression management. Elliott does not want to talk about the things that are bothering him. It's going to be a process for him, and we want to help him deal with things in a healthy, positive way. In all the rush this morning, I forgot to give the boys their morning meds and Elliott was in his full ADHD glory. He was a handful and still is but, he did well while we were there. He just…

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August 28, 2019

Akron Children's Hospital / Behavioral Health / Elliott / My thoughts

Hello @AkronChildrens, we meet again

So far, my plans for the day are firing on all cylinders. There's not been any hiccups aside from road construction in Akron. I mean seriously Akron, are you ever going to finish? Anyway, Gavin's been dropped off and Mr. Elliott and I are in the waiting room at Akron Children's Hospital. Elliott's not wanting to talk about the things that may or may not be bothering him, so I messaged the the nurse prior to our arrival so he was aware of what is going on. I'm hoping that makes things a bit easier Elliott. Mr. Elliott has kindly agreed that I can speak to what I know or feel he's going through and if he needs to correct me, he will do that. It's not perfect, but at…

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August 28, 2019

Akron Children's Hospital / Behavioral Health / Elliott / My thoughts

Some good news and our plans for the day

Here's some good news for today. Both boys made it to school, without any problems. Elliott was not thrilled but he cooperated 100% and I'm so thankful for that. The plan for the day is pretty simple. I have to pick Elliott up from school a little before noon, drop Gavin off with my Mom and head up to Akron Children's Hospital. Elliott has a followup in the behavioral health clinic. They are helping manage his depression, as well as handling all his medications for it. They're absolutely fantastic and I'm so appreciative for all they do. I promised Elliott that I would take him to lunch afterwards. He gets very anxious about any and all doctor appointments. As a result, he won't eat until after it's over. So, that's…

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August 28, 2019