The Journey to Independence: Progress does not require perfection

If you’ve been following our journey, you know that Gavin has come such a long way. He’s doing so well compared to where he was. However, I think it’s important also to state that improvement doesn’t mean perfection. There are still struggles, and they can be challenging to manage. Today was one of those days where I’m reminded of this. Gavin told me he was going to shave this afternoon. It’s hugely positive that he sometimes recognizes and prompts himself to do this without reminders. I’m proud of this little victory, and I told him that. He ate lunch and then went to the bathroom to shave. Gavin shaves with an electric/rechargeable razor. He gets about 80% of the job done independently but still needs help to get what he…

0 Comments

Helping My Kids Transition to Adulthood is Challenging

Making the switch from parenting young kids with autism to teens and adults can be challenging. Kids grow up so fast, and their needs change as they get older. The teen and young adult years are particularly tough because the push toward independence kicks into high gear. There are so many overlapping behaviors, and I'm learning that some teen stuff is normal. Autism and ADHD will always play a role, but at the end of the day, they're still teenage boys, and they're going to be going through adolescent boy stuff. My current focus is on helping Gavin to move out of the house and move on with his life. We (my incredibly supportive gf and I) have had several meetings with the Department of DD already, and Gavin has…

3 Comments

Every victory matters

It has been a little while since I've shared a victory. Okay, I know. It's been a lot longer than a little while, but better late than never. Today's victory goes to Gavin, and honestly, he blew my mind with this one. Gavin has always been heavily influenced by those around him, especially his younger brothers. He picked up Emmett's habit of constantly asking me if I was okay. I know he means well, but it's compulsive, and it's not uncommon for him to ask me a dozen times a day. It gets annoying sometimes because the repetition wears thin, and I'm hearing it from him and Emmett. I try to be patient, but sometimes it's tougher than others. Anyway, Gavin walked into the living room today and, like clockwork,…

2 Comments

This was once my worst fear

It’s hard to believe that we’ve been dealing with COVID for almost 3 years now. So much has changed during this time. COVID has become a part of everyday life that it’s even been incorporated into our favorite TV shows as well. I’m still not used to that one. LOL If you’ve been reading for a while, you know how hard I worked to shield the boys and I from the pandemic. Gavin is immunocompromised, Elliott has asthma, and even though Emmett and I don’t have anything that really puts us at greater risk, we still didn’t want it. Elliott ended up testing positive earlier this year and that was our first bout with COVID in our house. Everyone else managed to avoid it at the time. Fast forward to…

2 Comments

Finding Myself Again

I’ve been struggling to find myself. There have been so many changes in my life over the last few years and some of them significant. Some of these changes left me feeling lost and broken. I needed to rediscover who I am, and I’ve been on this journey trying too figure it all out. Our identities can become wrapped up in the people and things we hold most dear. For me, I was a son, a fire fighter/paramedic, a husband, a special needs dad, a caregiver, a writer, amongst other things. Sometimes life throws us curveballs and can result in major life altering changes taking place. It doesn’t matter if we welcomed those change or if they were thrust upon us. When we experience loss, significant change, or get too…

2 Comments

My Autistic Son Voted for the First Time: Here’s My Takeaway

Last week, my 22-year-old autistic son voted for the very first time. It was a momentous occasion for him. Seeing him exercise his right to vote was an emotional experience, and it got me thinking about what we can learn from his voting journey. Here are a few takeaways that I wanted to share. I also sat down with Gavin, and we talked about his experience on a recent podcast episode. You can also read my previous post about tips to help our kids vote by clicking here. The Importance of Accessibility One of the biggest barriers to voting for people with disabilities is accessibility. What many of us fail to realize is that accessibility to voting starts at home. It's so important that we, as parents, talk to our…

0 Comments

4 Tips To Help Your Autistic Child Vote

I've recently helped my adult autistic son exercise his right to vote. I recorded a short podcast episode about this journey, and it's embedded below. I wanted to follow up with some practical tips that helped me to ensure my son was able to vote in this election cycle. Everyone's situation is different, but if your son or daughter is of age and they wish to partake in democracy, this might be helpful. It's important to remember that people with disabilities, including autism, have the right to vote. However, voting can be a complicated process, and some people with autism may need assistance to exercise their right to vote. Register to Vote The first step in the voting process is registering to vote. In most states, this can be done…

0 Comments

The Importance of “Me Time” for Parents

Being a parent is one of the most rewarding experiences a person can have. But it's also one of the most challenging. Sometimes it can feel like you're constantly giving and never getting anything in return. That's why it's so important for parents to make time for themselves. My Most Recent "Me Time" Story This weekend, the boys spent some time with their grandma. They love spending time with their grandparents. While they were out living their best lives yesterday, I got some much-needed me time.I went on my own little adventure and was able to put back into myself. Even better, I no longer feel guilty about taking time for myself or for building my own life outside of just being a Dad. I spent some time out in…

0 Comments