It's been a hard day for me because I spent some time with Gavin and I've pretty much confirmed that he's getting worse. I should back up a bit and explain what I'm referring to. I had mentioned previously that it was going to be a quiet day. I had some things around the house I wanted to do and there were a few errands I needed to run as well. As per the norm, Gavin went with me to help. We were on our way to the bank, after filling up the water jugs and he began telling about some things he's been experiencing. The first thing he divulged was that he's been having nightmares again. The unsettling part of that is these nightmares involve the house burning down.…

I'm keeping this super short because I feel sick to my stomach. I need to share that we received Gavin's lab results back this evening, and unfortunately it's not good news.  Gavin's numbers across the board have dropped since yesterday. His Neutrophil level has dropped from 2.8 last month, 2.0 yesterday, and 1.8 today. His actual WBC was 3.8 yesterday and today it was 3.2 (I'm pretty sure that what they said.) After speaking with his doctor, Gavin will continue with the Clozapine for now, but needs blood work every single day. That's got Gavin really stressed out, and I don't blame him. I'm barely holding it together myself and it's not actually happening to me.  As I understand it, if or when he hits 1.5, we pull the plug…