I think we had a fantastic day and I feel quite accomplished. We got so much done today and I'm incredibly proud of my kids for their help. We got some of the basement cleaned up and hauled out to the trash. I've been meaning to do this for awhile but it's just not happened. The boys and I spent some time straightening up the house. I got the car washed and waxed as well. After dinner, I got the grass cut and the yard straightened. The boys didn't stick around for too long because the mosquitoes were bad. I even got a chance to close my eyes for a few minutes. I woke up with Ruby curled up on my shoulder. My parents stopped by this evening for a…

Depression makes everything so much harder to navigate, especially as a parent. We're neck deep in a worsening pandemic and we've been locked down for 115 days now. That is not conducive to good mental health. I find that I'm doing really good on some days but bad on others. I'm anxious, preoccupied with mortality and unable to focus or remember things like I normally would be able to. It's incredibly frustrating. I'm not a quiter and I don't easily give up but I'm really struggling right now. Sleep has been eluding me and to be completely honest, I'm nearing the 1 year mark since Lizze left. It still hurts and these milestones, especially the first ones, are very painful for me. I sorta feel like I'm adrift at sea…

I've been having the worst time sleeping lately. This past week I haven't had more than 3 hours of sleep a night, if I'm lucky. I'm grateful for even getting that much but it's not enough. Even melatonin isn't helping and that's about as hardcore as I can personally get because I need to be able to hear, respond to and assist my kids in the middle of the night. Stress is a major factor here and while I can't necessarily do a whole lot about that, there are things I can do. I'm aware that I haven't been drinking much water or at least not drinking enough water. That can have a profound impact on sleep quality. Depression is also playing a role in this as well. One of…

I had a pretty awesome day. I've been back recording for about 2 weeks now and I'm feeling good about it. My interview today has had a profound impact on me. I've received a much needed shift in perspective and I'm so thankful for that. I can't wait for you guys to hear it, probably second half of July. The kids did really well today. My interview wemt over my usual 60 minutes and extended into the realm of 90 minutes. Emmett waited a full 15 minutes before interrupting things to inform me that I was taking longer than I had prepared them for. Yes, it's annoying but typically he doesn't make the whole hour before needing me. I'm really proud of him being so patient. I honestly feel pretty…