Vaccine, it seems to be like the grand canyon of the autism community. You find yourself on one side or the other and there is no middle ground. I will start by saying that I don't subscribe to the vaccine theory nor does my wife for that matter. The reason I bring this up is because Gavin's psychiatrist has suggested we consider withholding Emmett John's MMR vaccine. Now before you grab your torch and pitch fork hear me out. He is one of the best in his field. We are very lucky to have him here. What he said was that vaccines as a whole are absolutely a good thing. There is no research to show otherwise. Majority of kids handle vaccines without any problems (which is why you should…

I realize people don't understand what raising a child with autism is like. Maybe they have unrealistic glimpses of what it's like when they spend brief periods of time with them. But I cannot take one more person telling me that "Thank God he isn't deaf, he's only autistic". As well-intentioned as they maybe it shows the amount ignorance there is in our country today. I have had at least 5 people say something to that effect since yesterday.  They truly have no idea. LT

When I started this blog a while back (originally at blogger) I was just using it as a safe place to vent my frustrations. I didn't expect anyone to actually read it let alone follow it. For so long my wife and I felt so alone. There are no places around here for support. The support groups that are close we always felt out-of-place. Gavin isn't nonverbal and sometimes we can't get him to stop talking. How could we go somewhere and complain about him always talking and saying inappropriate things when we were sitting next to parents who would give anything just to hear their child talk. It just felt wrong. However, since starting this blog I have found that there are many families out there just as lost…

Emmett John has been all over the place. All he does is scream. He is still sick a bit but there is no consoling him. He just flings himself backwards with no regard for hurting himself. He has been doing this the past few months or so. This could just be typical 2 year old behavior, right? Lizze and I have been discussing what we need to do now. We are using words like "early intervention" and "nonverbal". We never knew about this stuff with Gavin because he wasn't diagnosed till he was 5years old. And my biggest fear is that he will go down the same road Gavin did. But the reality is that Gavin's bio-dad is bi-polar and a sociopath. I always tell Lizze that the parts of…

Well as far as victories go we never have many. Yesterday though Gavin had a perfect day at school. Even after forgetting his backpack. This almost never happens and it happened on aday we really needed it to. The rest of the day with Gavin was good until after dinner when he really struggled but in fairness to Gavin the emotional level in the house was very high. So all things considered he had a really good day. He went to school this morning with a good attitude and said he was going to have an awesome day. Here's to hoping.. LT

As the day is wearing on reality is setting in. We most likely have 2 autistic children. How does that even happen? We're barely surviving Gavin how are we going to have what Emmett John needs? How are we going to have what Elliott Richard needs? Will Elliott Richard ever have a "normal" life? Does there ever come a point where we have been given enough challenges in life? They say that God never gives you more then you can handle. I sometimes think that's ridiculous. I think people say that because they don't know what else to say. The truth is that we were crumbling under the pressure before. How do we maintain anything now. No one understands Gavin now and I know where that has gotten us. Will…

Lizze and I are still shocked at the test results today. I don't know that we have even begun to process anything. Emmett John's hearing is perfect but he doesn't talk and he doesn't respond to noise. He is going to see the pediatric neurologist as soon as he can get in to rule out whatever else it could be. What they told us is that the most likely cause is autism. We have to keep talking to him and using words and they said it may just click one day. Now we will probably be going through the autism clinic at the children's hospital to if/where he falls on the spectrum. I honestly don't know if this is better or worse then being hearing impaired. Either way has its…

Well as you know Emmett John was at the Children's Hospital this morning. What you don't know is that I got the flu last night. I had to stay behind. This was to important to reschedule. Lizze called her mother and she came and took her and Emmett John to the Hospital for the tests. I just heard back from Lizze and they said Emmett John's hearing is perfect. Lizze asked why he doesn't respond to us talking to him? They said because they think he is autistic. They said he doesn't make good eye contact at all and the speech delay is typical. Right now thats all I know. LT