Went and got the van and brought it home. The engine light is on and I smelled the buring but no smoke and no obvious signs of anything. I have no idea what happened. I'll have to call on Monday and get it back in....AGAIN. While we were there we decide to bring Gavin home and not allow him to stay. He was not making good choices and was just not stable enough to leave him there. I deferred to Lizze on that cause I wasn't there. Elliott just became hysterical at the thought on Gavin leaving but decided to stay anyway. Just talked to him and he is having fun with Grandma. So that worked out. I had a talk with Gavin (while pointless, at least I feel I…

I fucking quit. I'm so tired and I just have nothing left. Gavin is just pushing EVERY button I have. It's probably not his fault but that doesn't make it any easier. In fact it actually makes it worse because then I feel guilty because I'm not handling it better. I woke up this morning at 6am with Emmett after being up with Elliott till 2am. I was feeling better and then the moring kicked in and Gavin was being Gavin, Elliott was whining and Emmett was getting into EVERYTHING. By this time I was sick to my stomach again. I wanted to let Lizze sleep cause she has been doing more then she should to help me while I'm sick. After she got up Lizze was going to her…

My blog turned it's 100,000th hit earlier tonight (80,000 of which have been since Jan 2011). I want to THANK everyone for taking the time to read and share in my families story. I'm really proud of this blog and I hope to continue writing long into the future. I feel pretty good about this because my goal was to share our story with as many people as were willing to listen. I wanted to reach those struggling like we are and let them at least know that they aren't alone. I want people not directly touched my Autism to learn enough to know they should learn more. I had hoped I help spread awareness and contribute to making the world a better, more understanding place for my kids.... I really appreciate…

Emmett has strep throat and a sinus infection. We had no idea it was that bad. He can't tell us and wasn't showing any signs of a sore throat. We have to break through this language barrier and communicate with our son. He should have to suffer without being able to tell us.

I wanted to kind of get back on track with the blog today. Since I have to be up cause Lizze had to take Emmett to the doctors I figured now as good a time as any. In the video included in the post you will see Lizze simply trying to get Emmett dressed in order to leave for the doctors. This actually went on for a few minutes before I started recording it. Now normally I would have jumped right in (or Lizze would have jumped in to help me if it were the other way around) to help her. However, we wanted you all to see just one of the "smaller" struggles we face with Emmett John. This is very typical of trying to get him dressed. As…

Gavin is driving me absolutely out of my mind. He is regressing and has no memory anymore. He gets back into the doctors on Wednesday. Wednesday feels like a really long time to wait. He doesn't listen and then claims he "doesn't remember". I don't know what to believe because he a VERY LONG history of manipulation. However, he does clearily appear to be regressing....so...I just don't know. Lizze took Emmett to the doctors a few minutes ago. Elliott came down a few minutes ago and asked me to hook up his Leapster to the TV in his room. I told him I would but he needs to make sure that his room is clean first. I told him that "I would then com up and set it up for…

I'm down for the count. I've been knocked out by the flu. I've been sick a handful of times in the last decade. I have some type of freakishly strong immune system. However, when I do get sick...I GET SICK. Tyically, I end up in the hospital in pretty bad shape. I've had at least 1 REALLY close call and I almost didn't make it. For those in the "know", it took 6 liter of saline to bring my BP up over 100 systolic.  That's A LOT of fluids. It always makes me really nervous when I start to not feel well because it can go very badly. My biggest fear was that I was going to get sick while Lizze was trying to recover from surgery. She made it…