The stress of everything is starting to really get to me.... I can't shake these headaches and my eyes hurt to have them open. I'm going to step back for a minute and just try to chill out... My whole body hurts and that's not good...

Most, if not all special needs parents share at least one thing in common. That one thing in common is a fear of the future. I constantly ask myself, "what will happen to my Autistic children if, God forbid, something happens to my wife and I?". Who will be there to finish the journey with them, if we cannot? What kind of support will they have? Will they end up like the "bare handed man"? I watched as he simply tried to help someone only to have that person try to run him over with her car. Is this what future holds for our special needs kids?

Today started out ROUGH to begin with. Emmett was up at 6am this morning. He accidentally kicked Lizze in the stomach (which is still very painful) which set the tone for her today. We got the kids dressed and off to school. We stopped and filled up the tank and we were on our way to Cleveland, more specifically Case Western Reserve University. It takes about 1.5 hours to get there (sometimes less) depending on traffic. So that makes for about a 3 hour round trip at roughly 130 miles. Traffic is usually pretty rough. This morning we were there to complete Emmett's testing. The first test done today was the "Bayley". The test focused on cognitive function and communication skills both receptive and expressive. The second test was "Reynell"…

April is Autism Awareness month. Some will have big plans for the next 30 days. I however, will be spending the 1st day of Autism Awareness month at Case Western Reserve University becoming more Autism Aware of my son Emmett. We will gain some valuable insight into what makes Emmett, well, Emmett. Autism Awareness starts at home. You don't have to do anything profound to make an impact. Sometimes it's the little things that make the biggest difference. Spend some extra time with your child. Get to know them better. You'd be surprised what they can learn. Little ripples can make big waves.... Remember that as we move into Autism Awareness month.

I'll be real honest, I haven't been this stressed out in a VERY long time. I have a post I want to write to give people a better idea of where exactly I am right now. It has to do with the level of responsibility I carry and how that impacts EVERYTHING. I'm hoping that writing that post will allow me to unload some of the weight for a bit. Maybe shake these headaches as well. All I know is, I can't survive with the amount of stress I experience anymore.  Something has to give.... -LT

It's been a really long, very bad day. I wanted to post more but I just don't have the energy.... Anyway, we got a call today from Case Western Reserve. We are back in Cleveland on Friday for more tests. It's a last minute "thing" I guess. I will helps us to have a better understanding of what makes him tick, so it will be worth the drive. I just have been getting these "headaches" lately. It's stress related but it makes it hard for me to see out of my left eye. The more stressed out I get the worse it gets. When I'm relaxed it gets better. Problem is I can never relax. I need to though if I'm going drive to Cleveland on Friday. I need to…

We got home a few hours ago. Basically they said that Gavin is extremely....um..backed up. That's what the vomiting is from. We are basically dealing with schizoaffective disorder that isn't properly managed or not responding to meds. On top of that we have all the complications of Autism. He's medically stable and the was the major concern. Now we wait to see if he responds to the meds.... Thanks for all the prayers and thoughts.....

I getting tired and hungry. We have been here for about 7 hours now and I haven't eaten since about this time yesterday. Trying to get Gavin resting a bit. Lizze is sleeping in her chair right now. Hopefully, we can swing by and grab something to eat if we ever get out of here. These plastic chairs are NOT good for someone with major back problems, that's for sure. I don't know what's taking so long.....