What kind of person shames a special needs parent?

Shaming special needs parents is not okay. It's not. I want to take a moment before we get into this I want to briefly talk about the shaming of special needs parents. Frankly, this applies to any parent but right now, I'm reaching out to special needs parents in particular because this is something we endure on the regular basis. People can be assholes. No one has the right to shame you. Most people have no clue what your life is like or the challenges you face every single day. These mean spirited, ignorant, and hateful people couldn't fill your shoes, let alone a mile in them. I hear from parents all the time who are dealing with judgment, ridicule, and shaming. It's heartbreaking and I know how hard it…

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Therapy is helping me become better

I had therapy yesterday and I feel like I'm making progress. I'm the picture of imperfection and I'm the first to admit that but the last to forgive myself for it. This last year has been incredibly challenging for me and that came after the hardest six months of my life. Losing my last two grandparents was so hard and I hadn't yet found my footing when my marriage imploded for a second time. That began a journey I didn't ask to go one but it was something I had no control over. Ensuring the kids got through all this has been my number one priority and honestly, that came at my own expense. Then COVID hit and our lives were turned upside down once again, just like everyone else.…

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Finding something positive in the remote learning chaos

There are a million reasons why this school year is a nightmare for so many students and families. Parents are struggling to find balance and that included me. I don't see how kids are going to receive the quality education they both need and deserve. That being said, remote and distance learning are necessary evils, for lack of a better term. COVID19 is very dangerous and we're taking this on in order to keep our kids safe, while protecting our teachers and school staff. I get why everyone is frustrated because I'm frustrated, as are my kids. I understand the sacrifice that many parents have to make in order for this to even have a chance of working. I'm not independently wealthy by any stretch of the imagination and I…

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Focusing on the positive helps me remember that #depression is lying to me

I'm very much in a darker place right now but I'm also refusing to give into depression. Fighting depression is an imperfect, uphill battle that's part of an invisible overarching war that I've been engaged in for most of my life. Part of my battle tactic is to force myself to focus on the positive things in my life. Depression tells me there's nothing positive but I know that's not true. There are three amazing little humans in my life and that's the most positive thing I can imagine. I'm going to share some pretty cool things my kids did today. Gavin's life is challenging for him but this kid never fucking gives up. This morning he was up before everyone else, which is normal for him. He focused on…

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I’ve been a single parent for exactly 1 year today and I have some thoughts

It's been one year since I became a single parent again. I've said before that I'm really weird with milestones and anniversaries because they mark moments in my life that were impactful for whatever reason. Maybe I'm too sentimental but it's just sorta the way I am. Everything in my life changed on August 10, 2019. I've been quite busy these last 365 days because the kids require the vast majority of my time and energy. Who am I kidding, they require more time and energy than I have on a good day. While none of this has been or likely will ever be easy, I've experienced a great deal of personal growth along the way. I'm learning a great deal about myself. What I deserve, what I don't deserve,…

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My little victory over #depression and a gentle reminder to all of you

First of all, I really appreciate all the love and support. We're all in this together and I sometimes forget that. Thank you for the many reminders. ☺ I wanted to share a bit more about something I alluded to in the previous post (see here). Yesterday, Elliott did his daily can we go walking Dad. I wish I could take them whenever they wanted me to but the truth is, I honestly don't feel it's always safe. There are also times when I simply lack the motivation and energy. That's usually due complications related to my ongoing war with depression. Without fail, Elliott asked me to take them all to Quail Hollow, a park within driving distance from our house. It's one of our favorite places to visit during…

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Navigating The In-Between

So last night was pretty rough. We're coming up on the one year mark since Lizze moved out and while I feel like the kids are doing better, there's still a tremendous amount of pain. Each of the kids deal with everything in different ways. Gavin simply accepts whatever he's told, never questioning anything. Emmett doesn't want to make waves, so he largely avoids any type of conflict but is angry. Elliott accepts nothing and keeps everything bottled up until he explodes. It was like an emotional nuclear bomb exploded in my living room last night. Elliott unloaded a great deal of what he's been keeping inside and all I could really do was listen. I don't agree with everything he said but I won't take away how he feels.…

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To Whom This May Concern: I Am In My Lane

I shared my recent interview with ABC News on the topic of wearing masks, and there have been some requests from within the autism community that I stay in my lane. It's been suggested that I just focus on autism related things because that's why people follow me. I thought a To Whom This May Concern type response made sense. I want to take a few minutes and explain why I'm doing what I'm doing and the purpose behind it. To Whom This May Concern We are living in a time where taking a stand matters. I'm a single Dad with 3 amazing autistic kids. My son is immunocompromised, and you better believe that I will use my platform to advocate for anything that will help keep him and others…

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