A major milestone in my battle with #Depression

I've been openly talking about my torrid relationship with depression for a long time now. It's important to speak openly and honestly because I want people to know that it's okay to talk about depression. There's no shame in battling depression and I think that when we suffer in silence, it's that much harder to stay afloat. At the same time, I understand why many people don't talk about it. Unless you're living with depression, it's very difficult to understand it. I have an update in regards to my current battle with depression. It's a big one and I'm feeling really good about it. Tonight marked the beginning of the third phase of my withdrawal from Paxil. That means I'm officially two months into the process and have one month…

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Depression Confessions: How the @fisherwallace Stimulator is helping me battle #Depression

UPDATE: I was speaking Chip Fisher, the President of Fisher Wallace Laboratories and received an update on insurance companies that are now covering the Fisher Wallace Stimulator.  I'll add to the list as I get new information.  Insurance companies currently covering the Fisher Wallace Stimulator: United Healthcare Medicaid in the State of Maine Click Here to purchase your own Fisher Wallace Stimulator It's been a little while since I've updated you on how my withdrawal from Paxil is going. At this point in time, I'm about halfway through the withdrawal process and things are going pretty well. If you've never experienced it first hand, let me tell you that withdrawing from drugs like Paxil, with a very short half-life can be extremely difficult, painful and even dangerous in not done…

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Depression Confession: Major progress has been made

Today begins phase 2 of my withdrawal from Paxil. I'm officially on half on my original dose and that's progress. The first two weeks were absolutely horrible. It was like the worst case of the flu I've ever experienced. That lasted about a week and a half. After that misery was over the insomnia began. My experience for the last week or so has been much, much better. The first two and a half weeks sucked but it definitely got better. For the next four weeks, I'll be taking 20 mg/day. That's 20 mg/day less than I've been taking for the last few years. More likely than not, therr will be more unpleasant withdrawal symptoms and I suspect it may follow the original pattern. I know how ridiculous it sounds…

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#Depression Confessions: 3 weeks into withdrawaling from #Paxil

Today marks the first day of the last week of the first four week phase of withdrawaling from Paxil. Did you get all that? lol There are four phases of withdrawaling from Paxil. The first two are each four weeks long. The last two are two weeks each. I'm officially beginning the final week of phase one. During this phase, I've been rotating between 40 mg/day and 20 mg/day. The first week was pretty horrible and I was really sick. By the end of the first week I was beginning to feel better but unfortunately, insomnia came next and that lasted about a week as well. The third week has actually been pleasant and I expect this week to be the same. After this week, my dose will officially be…

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Withdrawaling from #Paxil is causing new problem

This whole withdrawaling from Paxil has been a really difficult journey thus far. The first week of tapering down felt like the worst case of the flu I've ever had. It lasted about a week but has since subsided. I thought I was in the clear until the next phase starts in a few weeks. Unfortunately, that has proven not to be true. While I'm not sick anymore, I'm dealing with really bad insomnia instead. To be completely honest, I'm not sure which is worse, feeling like shit or not sleeping. The insomnia began shortly after the nausea, body aches and headaches ended. I'm really struggling to get any sleep at night. I've tried over the counter sleep aides and Melatonin but nothing works. The problem is that my brain…

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Depression Confession: Week 1 of Paxil withdrawal

It's officially the beginning of the second week of withdrawal from Paxil. What I've been doing is taking 40 mg/day on one day and then 20 mg/day on the next. I've completed the first week of this four week phase and it fucking sucked. You'd think I was withdrawaling from something hardcore and illegal but it's just an antidepressant called Paxil. I've received tons of messages from people who have gone through the same thing and understand how awful it is. I really appreciate all the feedback and support. Many people can withdrawl from Paxil without any issues whatsoever and there are others, like myself, who go through horrible withdrawal. It feels like the worst flu I've ever had. Having said all that, I seem to have come through the…

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This is like a medication induced roller-coaster

I've been trying to rest for a few hours and I'm feeling a little better, thank God. This experience is interesting in the sense that these side effects seem to come and go. It's like a roller-coaster of headaches and nausea.. There isn't really a rhyme or reason, as far as I can tell. It's been a rough day and I'm thankful it wasn't any worse than it was. My back is finally healing up and the hole is almost gone. I left the dressing off for a little while today in order to expose it to the air. Lizze suggested that I remove the bandage at bedtime and until the hole is gone, put a fresh bandage on in the morning. I happen to think that's a pretty solid…

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Who knew it would be this hard?

I'm officially feeling like shit. Coming off of Paxil is a fucking nightmare. I researched this for weeks before making a decision to do this and most people seemed to get really bad withdrawal symptoms. Some people can quit cold turkey and never have a problem. I'm apparently in the first category and there's no way to know own how you're going to react until you do. It feels like I have the flu. My head hurts, I've got the cold sweats and eating anything takes some serious effort cause the idea of food makes me want to puke. It could absolutely be worse because I could be coming off the Paxil much faster. The slower I come off, the less likely I am to suffer really bad side effects.…

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