The heartbreaking reality of parenting an adult child

Being a parent isn't easy. I don't think anyone would argue that statement. Being a special needs parents it's without a doubt, the most difficult endeavor of my entire life. We are facing a very difficult reality right now with our oldest, Gavin. Gavin's going to be 19 in a few months and we're still adjusting to him being an adult. My goodness, does that make me feel old. I've been raising Gavin as my own since he was about 15 months old. I legally adopted him many years ago and that was a moment I will never forget. I'll always look back on the day we went to court to make things final, as a blessing and a truly amazing experience. My personal journey with Gavin has brought me…

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This has been hard on my kids with #Autism

One of the things we try to do as Autism parents is control as much going on around us as possible. We don't do this because we're inherently control freaks, we do it because we try to limit the things that can cause our kids distress. Sometimes we have some control but more often than not, all we can do is deal with the fallout. We're living in one of those times right now. Last night we had a really bad storm knock down part of a tree, causing damage to our house and a massive amount of damage to our yard. We're very fortunate that it isn't worse than it is but the kids are struggling right now, Emmett especially. They are freaked out by what happened, the damage,…

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Why am I so exhausted? I’m an #Autism parent, that’s why

Going into this post, it's important to know that I'm frustrated and trying to make a point about why Autism parents, like myself are so exhausted all the time. Every time I'm asked why I'm so exhausted, it's a reminder how little people understand the challenges I face as an Autism parent. I'm absolutely venting but trying my best to do so in a way that helps to put things into perspective. I shouldn't have to say this but I love my kids and Autism is part of who they are. I accept them and love them just the way they are. The reality however, is that Autism can make things very, very difficult. If you can relate to this, please show your support by clicking the Like, Share or…

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Meltdowns and mayhem led to an incrediblely touching gesture

This morning has been a total disaster. Mr. Emmett woke up in a mood that can only be described as unfortunate. He woke up at one point last night and wanted to crawl into our bed but we got him back into his instead. Maybe he had nightmares again and that's what had him in such a horrible, outwardly aggressive mood. Elliott and Gavin were both the targets of Emmett's verbal wrath at one point or another. Both seemed to understand that Emmett was having a rough time and didn't react in a retaliatory manner. Very proud of them for that. I intervened, correcting Emmett when he lashed out but as most Autism parents can relate to, it's a very fine line between correcting behavior and escalating an already volatile…

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Self-care isn’t always easy but it’s absolutely possible and here are some ideas

I'm super proud of myself because after today's walk, I have already hit 40 miles for the month. In other words, over the last 16 days, I have walked 40 miles on the track. That doesn't including walking in general. That's specifically from me driving to the park, starting my Galaxy Watch and stopping it when I'm done. For me personally, that's pretty fricking amazing and I've come a long way. I haven't made anymore progress on my weightloss since my last weigh-in but I'm still at 305 lbs +/- 1 lb. That's a 35 lb weightloss in roughly the last 6 months. ☺ I'm feeling pretty good about myself because self-care when you're an Autism parent can be exceptionally challenging. I'm really pushing myself to focus on this and…

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This is just 1 example of why being an #Autism parent is so exhausting

Today's been a nightmare. I didn't sleep last night and that certainly doesn't help things at all. Gavin had a doctor's appointment this morning, right after the kids needed to be at school. Unfortunately, Emmett woke up with a tummy ache, which usually is the result of some underlying stress. It's nearly impossible to weed through everything with him and figure out what's going on beneath the surface because he struggles with self-awareness. What I mean by that and perhaps I used the wrong term, is that he's not able to tell you what's upsetting him, how he's feeling or what he needs, especially when he's upset. It's very challenging because Emmett is can be very insightful when it comes to other people and their feelings but he's often unable…

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I’m a freshwater fish in a saltwater tank

I found myself really frustrated today and I'm not entirely sure why. Most of the time, I'm the odd man out in our house filled with Autism and truthfully, that can be difficult for me at times. It's like everyone around me is operating on the same operating system and I'm simply incompatible. That probably sounds harsher than I intend it to but this does create problems for me on an almost daily basis. Everyone else in the house struggles with sensory issues. Things like smells, sounds, lights, textures, tastes and even temperature are things that constantly influence behaviors. No one in my family aside from me, does well with any type of change. It doesn't matter if it's a change for the better or for the worse, because it…

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As a general rule, I don’t apologize for any of my kids with #Autism but this is one exception

I mentioned in a previous post that something happened yesterday while at Gavin's hematology appointment. Akron Children's Hospital was great, they always are. You have to understand something before we go any further. This appointment took place where Gavin used to receive his IVIG infusions. We're very familiar with this place after years of visits. Gavin is a sweet kids and doesn't have a mean bone in his body. He would never intentionally try to hurt someone or say something that caused someone pain. Unfortunately, along with missing mean bones, he's also missing a filter. It's not uncommon for kids on the Autism spectrum to lack a verbal filter. They basically say it how it is, and are unburdened by things like inhibition. Typically, kids with Autism don't lie. They…

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