Spent a couple of hours with Gavin this afternoon. He had an appointment with his psychiatrist today for a medication follow up. This was in regards to his Clozapine specifically. This was an unexpected fucking emotional rollercoaster for Gavin today. Out of nowhere; he became distraught. When I asked him what was upsetting him, he explained that he's terrified that he's been put on Santa's naughty list because he's killed people while on missions. Super quick background If you're unaware, Gavin is schizophrenic along with everything else. His hallucinations revolve around going on dangerous missions to save the universe from evil. He has a team of superheroes that he leads. Along the way, there are times that he's had to kill evildoers. He was in the waiting room, physically sobbing…

I mentioned earlier that Gavin appears to be more and more paranoid. Part of the concern is about his schizophrenic hallucinations and the direction they're currently heading in. He seems to be worried about bad guys watching him or something to that effect. That's not necessarily new, but we see it with more frequency lately. What's weird is his current obsession with his health. He's very focused on rather benign issues, and we've never seen him show any interest in his health before. He's continually coming to us with things like I just coughed, my nose is runny, I just had to blow my nose, my arm muscle just felt funny, there's saliva in my mouth, my toe hurt for a second, I sneezed twice, my knee cramped up, and…

We had a great afternoon/evening at the movies. Avengers: Endgame was amazing. I'll leave it at that cause I don't want to ruin it for anyone. I'm so grateful that we had the opportunity to do this as a family. ☺ Unfortunately, that's where the awesome news ends and the bad news begins. After the boys went to bed tonight, Gavin came downstairs to take his bedtime meds, but before he did that, he needed to tell us something. I've grown to dread these moments because when he says things like this, it's seldom something I want to hear about. Gavin informed us that he wouldn't be able to help out around the house tomorrow because "I'm going to be needed at HQ a lot cause Sonic has a really…