Blog - Page 98 of 1611

I want to make our home more comfortable

One of the things on my agenda for life after the trip is reclaiming the house and making better use of it. We desperately need to move but that's not in the cards at the moment. The biggest thing we need to do is get the office put back together. The challenging part of that is trying to locate a leak that we have not been able to find for many years. Even after having the entire roof replaced, it still leaks. I'm really frustrated because I've repaired the ceiling quite a few times and a few years later, it leaks again. I need to find a good contractor whose adept at troubleshooting and repairing problem leaks. They will need to be bonded through some place like BondsExpress.com. I'm about…

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February 2, 2020

My thoughts / New Beginnings

It’s so f*cking heartbreaking

The boys came home around noon today and Elliott was in a mood from the moment he walked in the door. Visits are a mixed bag for any kid but when you factor in the complexity that Autism brings to the party, it's even more so. A mixed reaction to a visit with his mom doesn't necessarily reflect a bad visit. It's just a very difficult thing emotionally, to navigate and transition struggles are expected. That being said, he did eventually sit down and talk with me after he had a pretty big emotional outburst. Elliott doesn't like talking about his feelings and I can understand that, but we have to know what's going on in order to better help him. It's absolutely a work in progress but progress is…

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February 2, 2020

My thoughts

We need to play catch-up

I've been slacking a bit this weekend in the writing department and I wanted to provide a few updates before I call it a night. First of all, the boys are at their mom and grandparents house for the night. They'll be back home around noon today. The break has been helpful and I spent most of it resting. I started watching this new series on Netflix called October Faction. I also spent some time making further preparations for our trip to Orlando in the next couple of weeks. I've booked hotel stays for the way down and back. I've reserved the kennel for Ruby and she goes to the vet on Monday for a checkup and her kennel cough vaccine. The boys have a few appointments this week and…

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February 2, 2020

A few of my 2020 goals

One of my goals for 2020 is to further expand upon my efforts and to do that, it requires several things. One I need to setup more of a business structure. One of the things I need to do is meet with an attorney. Something similar to Kazmi Law might work. I've mentioned many times before that I wanted to setup a non-profit but I'm not sure. I make my living with this site via things like digital marketing and sponsorships. I sell adspace here and adspots on the podcast. This allows me to generate an income that helps me feed my kids and fuel my efforts going forward. One of my challenges is that I'm doing this alone. I don't have a team of people working for or with…

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January 31, 2020

My thoughts

How about some fantastic news

I'm in a rush at the moment but I wanted to share some good news. For the last 3 days, Emmett has gone to school for 90 minutes. The plan for this week was for him to attend for 1 hour and I would pick him up. Basically, I drop them off at school, go walking and then pick Emmett back up. The principal and I worked this out. This is major progress because when I pick Emmett up, he's not in a complete panic at this point. He says that it's not great but it's not terrible. That's progress and I'll take it. Beginning Monday, Emmett will be going to school for at least 2 hours each morning. He's feeling much better about school and while we aren't out…

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January 31, 2020

My thoughts

I’m not angry but I am frustrated and overwhelmed

Not a great deal was accomplished at our brainstorming session last night. The who point was to try and come up with some ideas that will help Emmett get back to school. I don't think the gravity of the situation is hitting everyone because they don't have to deal with any of it. I'm the only one facing these challenges with my kids. I'm the one that has to see them struggling and/or be up all night with them because they're having nightmares. It's frustrating for me because everyone else is on the outside looking in, while I'm drowning, trying to keep everyone afloat. I'm desperately in need of a solution that works. I'm not angry with anyone. I'm overwhelmed and at the end of my rope. That said, everyone…

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January 29, 2020

Confessions / Depression Management / My thoughts

#Depression is making life very challening

It's been a really busy day. I recorded two interviews and finalized another one for next week. I want to get as far ahead of myself as I can because the Florida trip is going to throw things off schedule. This way I pods releasing for the next few weeks. I just need to edit and schedule them before I leave. I mentioned that I'm seriously depressed and unfortunately, one of the biggest ways depression impacts me is my short term memory. It's weird because I don't really forget anything that happens or what is said. It's more that I lose my train of thought. When I'm interviewing someone, I have questions that pop up and if I don't jot them down, I will likely forget what I was going…

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January 28, 2020

My thoughts

The good news and the bad news

The day has been long and frustrating. First, I want to share some good news. I really want to refocus on finding the silver lining in each day. Gavin did his own IVIG Infusion today for the first time in a long time. His infusion went off without a hitch and without any leaking. Gavin came down the stairs afterwards and said "Dad, I was really lucky today because my infusion didn't leak." I looked at him, made him walk back upstairs and start over. This time, however, I wanted him to say "Dad, I did a great job with my infusion and it finished without leaking." The reason for me doing this was to reframe how he views what happened. Rather than just think he was lucky, I wanted…

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January 28, 2020