Something that I feel very strongly about is that it should be okay to feel the way you feel. Wow.. That's a lot of feels. When it comes to being a special needs parent, I feel all sorts of things ranging from basic exhaustion, frustration and anger, all the way up to the big one...resentment. My belief is that it's okay to have these feelings. In fact, I would argue that it's normal. It's what you do with these feelings that really matters. Does that make sense? Recently I have found myself at odds with those beliefs. Let me explain what's going on and then I welcome your thoughts in the comments below. My oldest son Gavin has me feeling rather torn on a great many issues.  For those new…

This is just for fun and I'm really looking forward to seeing everyone's response. If you had the choice between $1,000,000 or a fully loaded FedEx or UPS truck, which would you choose and why? Don't over-think this.  The money is pretty straight forward.  The FedEx or UPS truck would be full of packages and you could also keep the truck.  You have to decide whether you would want a truck full of presents or the cash. The truck load of presents could be worth more or less than the cash.  You just have to decide what you would do and than explain why. This site is managed almost exclusively via WordPress for Android. Please forgive any typos as autocorrect HATES me. ;-) Follow @Lost_and_Tired Visit the My Autism Help Forums…

We had a little mini-crisis this afternoon. This mini-crisis was a result of Gavin's actions this morning and the day long subsequent fallout. While Gavin couldn't have foreseen some of this, he did put the domino's in place and then knocked the first one over. This resulted in Elliott and Emmett being at each others throats for most of the day. They were fighting over a stuffed animal that Elliott had asked Gavin for this morning. Instead of Gavin giving it to Elliott, he turned around and handed it over to Emmett (who had no interest in it until Gavin gave it to him).  Gavin has admitted to doing this on purpose but doesn't know why he did this.  The reality is that Gavin simply thrives on chaos. He puts…

Lizze and I had a talk with Gavin, privately this afternoon about what had been going on. The conversation didn't go very well. One of the reasons that we wanted to talk with him was because his actions had put Elliott and Emmett at odds. Gavin didn't know how to react to us confronting him and so he freaked out.  His story kept evolving to fit the situation and he began tripping up before finally admitting that he had done this stuff on purpose but didn't know why. We weren't steering him in any direction and only asked for the truth. Gavin fessed up to what he was doing or rather what we know he had done. He doesn't like getting caught and held accountable. This site is managed almost…

Not too long after Gavin upset Elliott this morning, he apparently felt the need to move on to Emmett.  I don't know why but Gavin's in a mood today and so far, he's taking it out on everyone else. Emmett has this ball. It's his absolute, most favorite ball in the world.  At some point last night, one of the cats put a hole in the ball and it now looks like a shriveled up raisin. Instead of pulling me aside and showing me, he made a huge ordeal out of the ball being destroyed, right in front of Emmett.  Emmett became very upset and Gavin turned around and walked away.  I'm not going to make it today.... This site is managed almost exclusively via WordPress for Android. Please forgive any…

The morning has barely begun and already there is chaos as a result of Gavin. The boys were playing together and Elliott asked Gavin if he was using this one particular little toy. Gavin replied that he wasn't using it. Elliott asked of he could use it.  Gavin replied to him by turning around and giving it to Emmett, who didn't even want it until Gavin put it into his hands. Gavin now claims that he never heard Elliott which we know isn't true because he was talking to Elliott during the entire ordeal. This is exactly the kind of chaos creating crap that Gavin likes to do and then pretend to know nothing about anything. While this may seem like typical sibling rivalry, it's far from it.  The intentions…

Today was a rougher day than most.  Gavin had a more difficult day, full of less than stellar decisions. I will say that as the day went on, he did better and for that he deserves credit.  At bedtime, I told him what I always tell him.  I said, Gavin I love you. Have good dreams. Tomorrow is a clean slate, wiped of all today's mistakes.  Perhaps it sounds a bit cheesy but I want him to know that A) we love him tremendously and B) that everyday we start over with a clean slate. We still have consequences from our actions the previous day but we start over a new, hopefully using the mistakes we made yesterday to help us get through today. I know most of that is…

I wanted to share some good news with everyone.  As you know, my grandfather was in the hospital and ended up needing to have a tumor removed a few weeks ago. It turns out that not only does he have prostate cancer but it has spread to his pelvis. My parents and the rest of my Mother's siblings met with the doctor yesterday to discuss options and figure out prognosis. Everyone had questions and obviously concerns. While his particular form of cancer is pretty aggressive, they are going to begin a hormone treatment that is expected to basically put him in remission. They aren't promising anything because they can't. However, my grandfather is pushing 90 and is otherwise in good health.  The long and short of it is that they…