Dr. R is out of town on vacation this week. We met with his main nurse practitioner. Gavin is clearly delusional there is no arguing that. What she thinks is happening is the anti-psychotics haven't had enough time to work. We just increased the dose about a week ago. Gavin typically responds quickly to medication increases or changes but maybe it's just taking longer. She thinks that we are just seeing the schizoaffective disorder right now because it's not properly medicated.  Hence the "seeing things" that aren't there.   She could not advise one way or the other as to whether or not the Cleveland Clinic is needed because she hasn't seen Gavin since last year. She also doesn't want to mess with his medications until Dr. R gets back because of the increased risk…

Something Lizze and I both failed to consider is whether or not Gavin is suffering from delirium. When he was at the Cleveland Clinic last year that's what they diagnosed him with. They told us it's a life threatening condition.  I don't know how we overlooked that. We got caught up and focused on the hallucinations and wanting to stop those for him that we failed to see the larger picture. Gavin sees someone at Dr. R's office today and we will figure out what needs to happen. As much as I mentally prepared for this conversation I'm not ready to have it. Putting aside for a second what Gavin may need, what about the rest of the family. How will we survive with this added pressure? How can we…

Here are a few Gavin's latest creations. I promised I would take pictures and post them for him........ :-)

I never in a million years thought I would EVER be having this conversation with one of my kids. Does this sounds familiar at all to anyone? This is NOT his imagination. This is what a psychotic episode is like. Hopefully this will help Dr. R to decide what we need to do. If anyone has seen this type of behavior please let me know. I'm at a complete loss. This is what has happened in the past except now he seems to be able to articulate the experience better. To me this is another psychotic break, meaning he has lost touch with reality. He did go to sleep after his Ativan and is resting for now. Please know that I was flying blind here. I didn't know what to…

Emmett and I watching Ponyo on the couch.... A rare moment of "sorta" peace and quiet....

One of the things we struggle with is getting the kids to eat healthier. They each have texture and or color issues with food. I have found that allowing them to make a smoothie seems to "override" some of the sensory issues. I can sneak all kinds of veggies in there. Anyone else have success with this???

We are calling Dr. R first thing in the morning. Gavin is just "not right". Something is just off with him right now, more so then usual. Maybe he's just adjusting to the meds (we haven't seen him adjust to meds in a really long time). He's at the point of literally walking into walls. We can barely understand him and his memory is shot. Maybe it's just the med change (increase) but that was a few days ago and this just started.  I can't see a way out of this without a hospital stay. The movements are becoming an issue again also. I can say that I quite literally HATE these situations. There is no clear path to take. Any choice we make will have a very high cost…

I thought it might be helpful for me to get a few things off my chest. I carry around enough stress on a daily basis that I don't need to burden myself with more then I have to. I also want everyone to see what happens to many special needs families like mine. Maybe you can learn something from me and use it to avoid this from happening to you. Please note I have a very narrow focus for this post. This is not directed at my parents or in-laws. Confessions of a special needs parent: I'm angry, hurt, resentful and just plain PISSED OFF... I'm the oldest of 6 kids.and my confession is that I feel we have been abandoned by them.  I have been there for EVERY SINGLE…