Embarrassingly enough, we have yet to pull our Christmas tree down. However, it's proving to be a source of entertainment as of late.  The kittens have discovered the tree and have been having a blast inside of it.  It's really kinda funny to watch them race each other around the inside and then leap out of the top and take off across the floor.  I tried to get pictures but they were buried in their pretty good.  I just thought it was cute and it actually put a smile on my face.  :-)

What I'm about to share with you is deeply personal.  I'm laying down on the couch trying not to have an anxiety attack or vomit. At this moment in my life, rational or not, I feel like I'm losing Elliott.  Elliott, at 6 years of age, has been forced to deal with one trauma after another.  Most of these were a result of his big brothers violent behavior over the years.  It's not like I wasn't trying to protect Elliott and he wasn't physically injured by Gavin.  However, he has been hurt on an emotional level.  I hadn't realized just how bad it was until tonight.  Lately we've been struggling with Elliott.  He's so angry anymore,  and I honestly can't blame him.  In his eyes, he's lost his older brother…

Today was once again, Therapy Tuesday.  Every Tuesday, we cram a crap load of therapies in for the boys.  Doing it this way is exhausting but the boys love Tuesdays and it frees us up for all the other various appointments that pop up throughout the week. As much as I enjoy watching the boys in therapy, I am sooooooo glad that this is it for today,  we'll almost.  We had Dr. Patti tonight and the boys spent some time with her while Lizze and I hung out on the other side of the room. Someone,  I won't say who okay'd yo yo's out of the treasure closet after the appointment.  Friggin yo yo's. Does she hate me or something? Yo yo's are worse than slinkies when it comes to…

I wanted to share a recent and trending success we've had with Elliott.  Trending is probably a bit of wishful thinking but I'm trying to remain positive.  Elliott has decided that he's willing to take his antidepressant if and only if, it's mixed with Chocolate Pudding.  I think we tried this before and it didn't work. However, it's working now.  I'm choosing to view this for what it actually is, a victory.  :-)

I'm not really a cat person, I never have been.  However, as the cat population has grown these last few months, it's hard to avoid them.  Having said that, I've got to admit that they are really cute and their purring is quiet relaxing. We also haven't seen anymore mice this winter either.  I undoubtedly owe that to my new feline friends. I spent some time with Greysha this morning, after Emmett brought her over to me and dropped her off.   She really is a sweet cat and has come a long way from her near feral beginnings. I must have been petting her for 45 minutes and didn't realize it.  She's into chewing on fingers right now.  She doesn't bite or anything like that. It's almost more of a…

Emmett and I spent some time together creating art with Play Doh.  He and I put this Play Doh scene together and wanted to share it with all of you.  Play Doh is one of my boys most favorite things in the world to do. 

People always ask me, how do I keep going? That's a really good question, with a really complex answer. However, I've found a way to sum it up in a single picture. See below.  :-) This is how I keep going. I live for these tiny moments, where time comes to a screeching hault and I'm face to face with a child that is happy and smiling. My goal is to survive to the next moment like this.  It's how I hang on though all the stress and anxiety.  I think that's a pretty good answer.  I mean, who wouldn't keep pushing forward, in hopes of seeing that big wrinkled nosed, cheesy grin?