If you’ve listened to the podcast or even my Facebook Lives, you’ve probably heard me talk about hitting a wall last year. I don’t share this for sympathy or anything like that. I talk about it because I desperately want you to never experience what I went through.
Last year and part of this year, I experienced the worst period of burnout I’ve ever experienced. It lasted about six months and took me to a very, very dark place. I don’t want to delve into that darkness right now but it was bad enough that I never want to experience it again and it took a tremendous amount of energy to keep a smile on my face so no one knew I was struggling.
I was able to mask what I was experiencing pretty well until I simply couldn’t anymore and I began to fall apart.
It was so bad that I had no choice but to reach out for help. I opened up to my family, who had no idea how bad things were for me because I hid it from them. I hid it from everyone, not because I couldn’t go to them, but rather because I didn’t want to burden anyone with what I was going through.
It took some time and a few major life changes but I finally found my footing. I recommitted to making myself a priority, and restructured my daily life around self-care. It’s made all the difference in the world and while it can be a pain in the ass, I need it.
Self-care for me is working out, eating healthier, improving my living environment, and spending time with the people I love.
I have literally built my daily schedule around working out. I work out for two hours a day, five days a week. It’s made a huge difference in me both physically and mentally. It helps me manage my ADHD, control my racing thoughts, keep myself centered, and feel more comfortable in my own skin.
Even still, I need to recommit to self-care from time to time. I can sometimes drift away from my routine and begin to slide backwards. I caught myself doing that again recently and had to once again recommit to making myself a priority. I was slacking a bit at the gym and stopped walking in the morning. I was straying from my healthier diet and not getting enough sleep. This isn’t anyone’s fault but my own. It started with work stress and not walking in the morning because of the air quality alerts. My routine slowly began to fall apart. I put a few pounds back on and decided enough was enough.
This week I started walking again and my workouts have been amazing. I’m focusing on facts over feelings, meaning I may feel like I’m failing but the fact is, I’m not. Life has never been better and while I still have a lot of work to do, I’m making progress every day. When the voice in my head tells me I’m not enough, I counter it with something positive. Most importantly, I open up to those closest to me and it really helps.
I wanted to share this because I know so many of you struggle with feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, scared, frustrated, isolated, and like you’re not enough. I’m hoping that you can learn from my mistakes and avoid some of the things I’ve had to learn the hard way.
Self-care is so important and you’re worth it.
Amen. I have been there. I have a 52 yr old special needs son that lives with us. It’s challenging at times. I know and have lived with your struggle since 1971.
God doesn’t gives us more than we can handle… I want you to know… that’s a load of crap. God gives us a lot more than we can handle but He’s there to help carry the load.