It’s stressful day but I ended up getting some really good news. Since being on lockdown, I haven’t been to see my doctor. The last time I was seen was September of 2019. I was not in a good place at that point because my wife had just left and I was feeling completely lost trying to raise the kids on my own.

When I was seen for a routine checkup, I have my routine labs run and while they weren’t super bad, they were bad for me.

My glucose was high, my cholesterol was high, my triglycerides were high and I was pretty much a hot mess. I was not in a good place emotionally and I that certainly wasn’t helpful.

I was supposed to return for a routine followup in April of 2020 but we were already on COVID lockdown trying to keep Gavin safe. I canceled the appointment and never rescheduled because I’ve been preoccupied. Eventually it caught up to me and one of my medications needed a refill and my doctor wanted to see me before refilling the script. I totally get it and frankly, I’m grateful for that because it forced me to focus on myself.

My appointment isn’t until later this month but I need to get blood work done prior to having my virtual appointment.

The original plan was go to my divorce hearing on Tuesday morning and get my labs done on the way home. I was thinking about it this week and I decided to go this today instead of Tuesday. I’m probably not going to be wanting to do a whole lot after the hearing and I felt this was a better idea.

The other reason for this has to do with Lizze and the kids. Lizze was going to meet me at the house before the hearing in order to give the kids what she has affectionately dubbed a drive-by hug. This basically entails the kids masking up and giving her and grandma a quick hug before s brief, socially distanced visit (outside).

I was a concerned about the optics of this because the kids are aware of what’s happening that morning and I feel like her stopping by to give them a hug literally right before we get divorced, might freak them out. Sorta like she was saying goodbye or something. I personally felt that it would be better to just go to the hearing first and then afterwards, have her do her drive-by hug. I think this would send a positive message to the kids that everything is okay and we’re still a team. This only works if I got my labs done early. Make sense? It’s really important to both of us that the kids see us working together and getting along.

If they get to see her immediately after they know the divorce has been finalized, it should help to reinforce that nothing has really changed and they still have their mom. That’s my thought process anyway.

That being said, I want to steer this car back onto the road because I got a bit off track.

I had my lab work done today and I have been really worried that with all the stress of the last year, I would be so much worse off than I was back in September of 2019. I pushed myself to get this done because knowledge is power and I can’t fix or address a problem if I don’t know what I’m dealing with.

I received my lab results a few hours later and I couldn’t believe it.

My glucose was well within the normal range. My total cholesterol was 160, down from 217 and my triglycerides were 170, down from 199. I have some work to do there but I’m almost into the normal range and that’s progress. Everything else was perfect. I need to boost my good cholesterol a little bit but it’s really close. This is such a huge weight lifted off my shoulders because I’m actually doing really good.

I’ve been locked in my house with my 3 autistic kiddos for about 337 days now. I haven’t been able to go walking and workout like I used to. I’ve been incredibly stressed out and trying my best to cope with life. I haven’t gained a single pound this entire time. I’ve only lost 5 lbs but I haven’t gained anything. That’s fucking amazing. I even had my doctor check my cortisol levels because I was worried about that as well. Even that was normal.

I’ve been eating pretty healthy over this past year and I’ve been trying to workout every other day, even if it’s just running in place for 30 minutes. My new mattress has really helped with sleep and I think I generally have a good outlook on life.

I still want to lose about 50 lbs but that’s totally doable. This gives me a clean bill of health and puts me in a great position to hit the reset button on my life come Tuesday morning. I feel so good right now and I wish I knew what exactly I was doing right but I’m just gonna keep on keeping on because whatever I’m doing is working.

I’m not saying I don’t have work to do. I know I do. At the time, a clean bill of health is a great starting point.