Today marks day 70 of COVID19 lockdown for my family. It’s been a long journey and I’m afraid we aren’t even almost there yet.
I’m preparing to remain locked down as long as it takes to keep my family safe. Yes, it’s a massive sacrifice but the alternative is unacceptable to me. We have made some progress in one area and I wanted to share that.
All visits had stopped due to lockdown. Gavin’s immunocompromised and Lizze has high risk people in her house. I approached Lizze about finding a way to make at least one visit work.
After some discussion, we decided that if everyone in her house locked down for 14 days, and at the end of that time, everyone was fever free and healthy, we could allow the kids to spend 2 days with her. This is not easy for me to do because I have to trust where trust is difficult. I feel like Lizze understands the gravity of this and while it’s hard for me to let go a little right now, I think it’s good for them to see her and I think it’s good for her to see them.
There are many complications that I’ve not spoken about in regards to the ending of my marriage and I have reasons for everything I do. None of my actions are malicious in any way. Every decision I make that might appear that way in the outside, is made in concert with the advice and guidance of the kids doctors and therapists. Everything is about the kids.
It’s not that I fear Lizze will do anything to hurt the kids. I know she wouldn’t. This is more about me letting go during a time that I know I can only ensure their safety if I don’t let go. Does that make sense?
It makes perfect sense. And I know this is not malicious behavior toward LIzzie. It’s hard to maintain sense of safety and non worry when you sons are out of your care, even for a moment and even if they are with the mother, unless you are there to make sure there are no unexpected areas of potential
exposure that your wife and her family members may not be totally aware of. I would give it deep thought and consideration also if I was in your place. People have to realize that this virus is extremely bizarre in so many ways. People can appear to be healthy as can be and still be infected but show no signs at all. Even the testing is possibly not always dependable or available. It would be great for them to spend time with their mother but you do what you feel is best. I feel we all understand your feelings.
You all are in a hard place. It’s also going to get even harder, I think. The states are opening back up. Now, I read what employees have to do in Ohio to be safe, and it’s good. But since customers or clients don’t HAVE TO wear masks, there will still be unnecessary spread. And the fact is, cases are still growing in the US. I think even people who believe that sheltering in place is good, are still getting tired of being stuck mostly inside. This thing isn’t over at all, and I find myself wondering how many more Americans will die while Trump is patting himself on the back?