Today at 1pm I will be starting my second therapy session with my new therapist. The first session was literally the morning after my wife left and not much was accomplished aside from me unloading everything that I was feeling. I think I caught my counselor off guard.

I feel like this therapist might be a good fit for me personally and that’s important.

I was such a hot mess last week that I didn’t even get the paperwork filled out. She asked why I was there and the floodgates opened and she went with it. I really appreciated that. She suggested that we finish the paperwork next time. I feel like I’m in a better place today because I’ve had a week to begin wrapping my brain around all of this. I still have so many questions that I’ll likely never get the answers to and I have to accept that.

I’ve grown a little over the last week and while I still have my moments, I’m very focused on navigating my kids through this trauma. I need to get us out of our neighborhood and into a safer environment. I need to focus on replacing our car, as it’s on its last leg. I can’t do any of those things if I’m a mess.

Depression is a constant struggle in my life and something like this will fuel my depression for a very long time if I’m not careful.

I’m very focused on bettering myself and being there for my kids in anyway that they need. I don’t think I can do that without help. My family has been amazing, and that includes my inlaws. Everyone is very focused on the kids and that’s where the focus should be. Therapy is my time to focus on me, so I can be better for them.