No matter what you do or where you look, someone’s always got a bee in their bonnet over something. The latest thing I’m seeing is in regards to parents who post video of their child with Autism having a meltdown.
I haven’t viewed many of these videos because I live it everyday.
I have however, posted videos in the past of meltdowns and tantrums. I stand by my decision to do so because my only goal was to educate people.
The videos I posted were presented in sort of a raw or uncut manner and always included detailed explanation.
I would never support the posting of such videos as a means of demonizing a child with Autism.
There have been videos that I’ve seen where the person behind the camera seemed to be poorly handling the situation and one could argue even instigating the child in question. At the same time though, I’m not there and I don’t have an intimate knowledge of their unique situation, so I don’t judge.
I chose to share what I experience as a parent to three boys with Autism because I believe it’s the best way to educate the public. TV rarely displays Autism in a realistic way and major Autism organizations either paint an overly positive or overtly negative view of Autism.
I think it’s important to share things like this in as tastefully and transparent way as possible because it allows someone else to experience how Autism impacts your child as well as the life of your entire family.
There does come a point where you really have to begin thinking about privacy issues.
My kids are at a point where I will usually seek their permission to post something that could be of a more personal nature. This blog is a popular read for other parents and staff at their school so I am very mindful of that.
At the same time, they are in a school for kids with Autism and so most people are able to relate to what we experience and find solace in knowing that they aren’t alone.
The peer group at my boys school is vastly different than that of a more traditional school environment and they don’t stick out because they are with kids that experience many of the same challenges.
I think it’s important to share our stories.
I think it’s important for the world to see how Autism impacts in real life.
That being said, as with everything else in life, we need to do so in a way that balances the need to educate the public, family and friends with the inherent need for privacy as our kids get older.
The only way we can help secure a bright future for our kids with Autism is to help the world gain an understanding of what makes them tick.
Sharing of these videos is a very personal decision but I believe if it’s done in the right way, it can really be a positive thing. Likewise, if it’s done in the wrong way or for the wrong reasons, it can be very exploitative.
I personally reserve judgment when it comes to these things because I’m not in their shoes. It’s not my decision to make.
While I agree that children need privacy as they get older, I do also agree that it’s important to help others understand what an autistic child has to suffer and what the family has to cope with.
My autistic son is an adult now, but when he was younger the temper episodes were so sudden and so violent, a nursery teacher once called for medical assistance because she thought he was having a fit. I tell people now how it was day in, day out during his childhood, never knowing when he was going to get upset or by what, and I am sure they assume I am exaggerating. It’s really difficult to get people to understand unless they actually see it. My son would writhe around the floor, kick, bite, break furniture, scream, be sick, sometimes for hours on end…well, you know how it goes.
One concern though – the hardest thing to portray may be the often irrational reason for the outburst. I can think of many occasions when my son had extreme tantrums and made himself very sick because of something apparently trivial like being given the wrong pencil.
My kids enjoy being in the blog and getting all the positive feedback from everyone. Now that my boys are at an age where they do like some privacy, I never post anything without their permission to do so. I mean, I’ll post regular pics but if there’s anything that could be embarrassing, I leave it up to them and if they say no, it’s no. Sometimes they want things posted because they want to help others learn but there’s never any pressure to do that.
I think you have it completely right and I appreciate everything you post.
I personally don’t like the idea of posting videos or pics of kids, special needs or not. I feel sorry for those kids who live their lives with cameras in their faces while their parents snap pics of every possible moment, good and bad, to post on social media and/or blogs. I feel like kids deserve some privacy and anonymity.
While I agree that children need privacy as they get older, I do also agree that it’s important to help others understand what an autistic child has to suffer and what the family has to cope with.
My autistic son is an adult now, but when he was younger the temper episodes were so sudden and so violent, a nursery teacher once called for medical assistance because she thought he was having a fit. I tell people now how it was day in, day out during his childhood, never knowing when he was going to get upset or by what, and I am sure they assume I am exaggerating. It’s really difficult to get people to understand unless they actually see it. My son would writhe around the floor, kick, bite, break furniture, scream, be sick, sometimes for hours on end…well, you know how it goes.
One concern though – the hardest thing to portray may be the often irrational reason for the outburst. I can think of many occasions when my son had extreme tantrums and made himself very sick because of something apparently trivial like being given the wrong pencil.
I think you have it completely right and I appreciate everything you post.
My kids enjoy being in the blog and getting all the positive feedback from everyone. Now that my boys are at an age where they do like some privacy, I never post anything without their permission to do so. I mean, I’ll post regular pics but if there’s anything that could be embarrassing, I leave it up to them and if they say no, it’s no. Sometimes they want things posted because they want to help others learn but there’s never any pressure to do that.
I personally don’t like the idea of posting videos or pics of kids, special needs or not. I feel sorry for those kids who live their lives with cameras in their faces while their parents snap pics of every possible moment, good and bad, to post on social media and/or blogs. I feel like kids deserve some privacy and anonymity.