I’ve been trying to work with Gavin on staying out of Lizze’s personal space.  Since he’s been home, he’s already been violating her personal space on numerous occasions. 

Before everyone is going to jump on the autism train, take a deep breath and hear me out. 

Boundary issues are very common with those on the autism spectrum.  However, while that may play a small part in this, there is much more going on behind the scenes. 

Gavin is a child with reactive attachment disorder and also a very long, documented history of targeting Lizze with inappropriate behavior. This appears to be more of the same.  He’s brushing up against her and is making contact with her breasts as well. 

Yesterday I had to inform him that if he violated his mother’s personal space again, he would lose his choice of meals and instead receive the default, which is oatmeal. 

Shortly after being told that, he violated her personal space once again. 

He’s not doing this to anyone else, only his mother.  That is very consistent with reactive attachment behaviors. For whatever reason, the mother is usually the target of these behaviors. 

These things happen in a way that tend to make it look like Lizze is making this all up.  That’s another RAD this thing as well.  It’s called splitting.  It’s essentially a divide and conquer type thing.  The behavior is intended to create tension and chaos.  The ultimate goal being to pit Lizze and I against each other.

Having said that, I have been witness to these things on too many occasions not to know what’s going on. 

At this point in time, Gavin is doing well with his brothers and that’s a huge plus. However, if he continues to violate clearly placed boundaries, we’ll,  I don’t know what’s going to happen.