I have been taking inventory of my parenting skills lately. I do this on occasion to kinda keep myself in check and focus on the things I need to improve on.
One of the things I’m aware of isn’t he fact that I’m so tired all of the time.
On most days, it takes a great amount time and energy to get my kid to cooperate and get things done. They aren’t disobedient, it’s just that there are so many factors that influence where they are on any given day.
Sometimes between me being tired and them being, well, who they are, I have to employ alternative methods in order to accomplish what needs to get done.
On occasion, I’ve been known to offer incentives for them to listen. Alright, it’s less of an incentive and more of a bribe. I’m not exactly proud of this but sometimes the boys need something to focus on and I need sanity.
On that note, I thought we could share some stories of times we’ve had to bribe our kids. What sort of things did you use as bribery? Did it work?
Yes, I just recently bribed my 14 year old daughter to be honest with her father about her feelings. My ex-husband just can’t let things go regarding our marriage that ended almost 9 years ago! I have talked to my daughter about saying things like, “Dad, I really don’t want to be in the middle.” or “This conversation makes me really uncomfortable.” She said she is afraid he would do anything but didn’t want to deal with him possibly getting mad.
So, last weekend I told her, “I will give you $100 if you are honest with your father.” She said, “Seriously?” I said that I was serious. You know what she finally did it. So I guess getting the $100 was motivational enough to not worry about his feelings. Good or bad, not sure but hopefully this is just the beginning for her in finding her voice.
@IsThisAbusive wow… Go you. ! I’m glad she found her voice. 🙂
I actually ran a token economy for several years with my children. As they did certain tasks or chores, they were given funny money. When they had enough funny $$ they could turn them in for rewards on the chart. $$25 would get them a trip to the dollar store and dollar movies. Or they could buy video game time, computer time, or dinner out alone with mom. This worked well for 3-4 years. When they were tired of this, we went on to other methods.
Karen
@Batty I like that idea. 🙂
My Son is 15 and doesn't cooperate very well at all right now. So yes he gets bribed. I have to bribe him with going shopping or a video because he doesn't he solid food. It is always hard to find something that he really wants so that he will cooperate.
@PatriciaShaver Thanks for sharing that.
For my 4-year old – who's autistic – either candy (which we're fully stocked up on now) is a good incentive/motivation/bribe or, in the past, we've used Thomas videos or TV time as a way to get him up and going and doing what he needs to.