I'm really hoping that Emmett will be returning to school in the morning. We have had our routine out of whack for over two weeks now and we're all paying a price for it. I haven't been able to workout regularly in weeks and the things I can do at home, don't give me the same emotional boost that walking outside does. I think that's part of why my depression is kicking my ass right now.
Before I get into this a bit more, I feel like this can be a teaching moment and I'm hoping that by sharing this, I can provide some insight and additional context about some of the struggles that parents like myself face.
It can be really hard to manage Autistic kids on a good day. It's incredibly difficult to manage them when they are sick,
Many kids with Autism, also deal with sensory processing issues. This basically means that they are more sensitive to external stimului and can very easily become overwhelmed. Things like bright lights, loud noises, textures, colors and smells can be very distressing for kids like mine.
If you can't stand the feeling of clothing on your skin, ultimately, you can remove the clothes and feel better. Imagine what it's like for a child with sensory issues to be congested, have a stuffy nose, a sore throat or even a cough. There's no way they can escape that stimuli and they quickly become overwhelmed. My kids have been sick for two weeks now and they haven't been able to escape that overstimulating stimuli. It disrupts their sleep and basically drives them crazy.
No kid likes to deal with a cold. It's a miserable experience but for many kids with Autism, it can be absolute torture.
Autism parents often find themselves in very challenging situations, where the illness itself isn't enough to warrant a missed day of school but the way their child experiences is it leaves them little choice. Kids with special needs in general, are significantly more likely to miss school than their typical peers.
Personally, I've taken the *fuck it *approach to this. I'll explain in a minute.
My kids go to a private charter school for kids with Autism and I have a very good relationship with the school. They are incredibly accommodating and are always happy to work with the students on anything they need. Unfortunately, the State lumps all students, Special Needs or not, into the same group. They hold kids with special needs to the same standards as their typical peers. IEP's help to counter balance that disadvantage but attendence can still be a major problem for families like mine.
When I say I've taken the *fuck it *approach to this, I mean I just don't give a shit. I don't keep my kids home without good reason and I will not put them in a situation where it's simply cruel or expecting too much. I used to get really stressed out about missed days due to a special needs related issue and sometimes I still do. Overall though, I just say *fuck it *and do what I feel in my heart is in the best interests of my kids.
It would be really nice to see the laws be more accommodating to those with special needs. Unfortunately, while we've made progress over the years, there's a long way to go.
As I said at the beginning, I'm really hoping that Emmett can return to school tomorrow. I feel at this point, we can at least try to make it work. If he tries and can't make it, then the school will call and I'll pick him up. Both of my kids absolutely love school and hate missing days for any reason.
The only thing easy in regards to being an Autism or Special Needs parent is loving our kids. That part is easy. The rest is a level of challenge that one can't truly understand unless one experiences it first hand.
