Yesterday, I made the decision to ask the kids what they’d like to do, which is something I wouldn’t normally ask them in this kind of situation for a number of reasons.

This time however, I asked them. I did this because they don’t get to see their mom very much and I know that’s hard on them. The boys expressed a desire to go with their mom this time because they knew they could only do one or the other.

I made the arrangements and the boys will be staying a bit longer tomorrow in order to go trick or treating with the mom and grandma. It felt good to do this and at the time I hadn’t realized that this would be the very first time I’ve not taken them trick or treating. That thought occurred to me last night and it was kind of like a kick in the nuts.

I hate being in this situation and I hate that my family has been fractured. It hurts and it’s created so many more problems, where there was an overwhelming amount of problems already. Unfortunately, the kids and I are the ones picking up most of the tab for this.

That said, I feel heartbroken that I’ll miss trick or treat with my kids for the first time but I’m comforted by the fact that making this decision, has allowed them a bit more mom time.

It is what it is and I’ll survive. Elliott promised to take pictures and that’s cool. I was able to have the experience of making the costumes with the boys and that will be my Halloween contribution this year.

I hope that everyone has a great time and I also hope that they leave their candy at their moms house. 😂