We had a pretty rough night here in The Autism Dad household. It was all things that were emotional in nature and outside of anyone’s control. It sorta came to a head at therapy last night. It was a turbulent emotional roller-coaster in the sense that the boys talked about things they didn’t want to talk about.
When we came home, everyone was emotionally spent and in need of decompression.
Elliott was so stressed out about things he was supposed to do today and I finally decided to pull the plug on some of it, simply to provide him some relief. These things are important but so is his sanity and emotional wellbeing. It was a judgment call and I made it.
Poor Emmett was so stressed out that he had a very difficult time falling asleep. I ended up postponing what I needed to get done in order to sit with him so he could fall asleep.
I didn’t mind at all. I just had a few loads of laundry that needed done for today and food that needed baked for lunches. It meant I was up later than I wanted to be but it is what it is. He ultimately feel asleep and that’s the most important thing.
My stress level is through the roof and I’m really struggling with life right now but I’m also not quitting or giving up. That has to count for something. ☺
As someone who has gone through the highs and the lows of being an Autism Dad for the past 36 years of our son’s life, I understand what you’re going through. The one thing that touches me about you as a father, is that no matter how low the lows, you never give up. I gave myself the term “the Phoenix effect.” I would constantly feel like I crashed and was consumed by the fire but like the mythological Phoenix bird, would some rise out of the ashes with a renewed strength to somehow continue on to do whatever it was, within my power, to help my son. I’m 69 now and I still am and will always be an Autism Dad. I’ve read your blog for a few years and have a great respect and admiration for you as both a man and a father. Continue to hang in there, as I know you will. Your boys,both through their highs and lows, good times and bad times, will always know they can count on their Dad to understand them and protect them and try his best to make their world a little bit brighter, even in what sometimes appears to be dark times. Take care to you all. Your sons are so lucky and blessed to have a man like you as their father.