It's a really big day for me and I'm incredibly nervous. Around lunchtime, I'll be meeting with an oral surgeon about my wisdom teeth. I know this isn't a big deal and teens have this done all the time but I'm terrified.
My last experience with the oral surgeon was traumatic and has impacted my life in ways that it shouldn't have.
I was maybe 7 or 8 years old and playing with our new puppy on the living room floor. I was playing tug of war with our dog and I thought it would be a good idea to hold my end in my mouth.
Our puppy tried to get a better grip and ended up biting my lower jaw. It was an accident but she ripped out the only adult tooth I had in my mouth at the time. It didn't hurt because it happened so fast but there was blood everywhere.
I was rushed to the ER and then to an emergency oral surgeon. I was terrified, uncooperative and had to be restrained. The next thing I remember were needles being stuck, right into the tooth socked and surrounding area. It was so painful and I was so scared.
After that, they put a mask on my face, told me to count backwards from 10 to 1 and I don't remember getting passed 7. Next thing I knew, I was waking up with my missing tooth, surgically reimplanted.
I was never the same after that. My fear of the dentist began, as did the reoccurring nightmares of my teeth falling out.
Anyway, even thinking about going to an oral surgeon is something that's literally making me sick. My anxiety is through the roof and I'm not sleeping.
That said, I'm trying very hard to set a positive example for my kids. I don't want them to allow fear to dictate their lives and I need to show them that I'm going to do this, even though it's really scary for me.
This wouldn't be an issue for most people because they would go in, take a nap, wake up an hour later and be done. To me, that's an unbelievable feat of bravery and something I'm not sure I can do myself.
Just for a bit of perspective, I used to go into burning houses with the fire department and manage major traumas in the back of an ambulance, for upwards of 40 minutes or more, sometimes on my own. That's pretty insane.
I've seen and experienced things most couldn't even imagine. I've run thousands of calls and had to make split second life and death decisions, in the worst possible circumstances.
None of that scared me. I'm not a coward.
The idea of walking into the oral surgeon tomorrow, even though it's just a consult, is absolutely terrifying.
Having said that, I'm also feeling incredibly lucky because of who I'm going to see.
I'm seeing a friend from high school and he's insanely over qualified to extract three wisdom teeth. Here's the bullet points:
- University of Notre Dame B.S., 2000
- Ohio State University D.D.S., 2004
- University of Louisville M.D., 2007
- University of Louisville General Surgery Resident, 2007-2008
- University of Louisville OMFS Chief Resident, 2009-2010
- University of Louisville Residency Program, 2004-2010
Extensive Training in:
- Dentoalveolar Surgery
- Implantology
- Orthognathic Surgery
- Maxillofacial Trauma & Reconstruction
- Facial Esthetic Surgery
- Maxillofacial Pathology
- TMJ Disorders
- Craniofacial Surgery (including cleft lip/palate repair)
Extensive Experience in:
- Anesthesiology
- General Surgery
- Trauma Surgery
- Plastic & Reconstructive Surgery
- ENT/Otolaryngology
- Oculoplastic Surgery
- Surgical Intensive Care
- Internal Medicine
He's an old friend, I trust him and feel as though I'm in good hands. That's providing me with a great deal of comfort.
I'm sure I'll feel better after sitting down and going over everything with him. I have 3 wisdom teeth and only 1 is partially impacted. Once I know what to expect, and I figure out the logistics, I'll be in a better place.
Since this isn't an emergent situation, at least to my knowledge, we're going to plan this around Lizze's headache infusions. She's in tremendous amounts of pain and the infusion will take about a week. We'll have to travel to the Cleveland Clinic for 6 hour sessions and there's zero chance of me doing that right after oral surgery.
I feel this is the right thing to do and barring anything unforseen, that will be the plan.
I'm not looking forward to any of this but at the same time, I'm tired of it hanging over my head. I want to get this done as soon as possible but as a special needs family, we have to make lots of arrangements and plan everything out very carefully.
Here's hoping I feel better about this after today.
