Funny story.
I picked up the boys from school and both were in good moods. That's always a good thing. I have to specifically ask them if anything happened that they need to talk about because otherwise, they will rarely raise any concerns on their own.
Elliott explained that he had gotten in trouble at school today. He said it was a misunderstanding but he doesn't understand why.
He was in line, waiting for people to finish changing after martial arts class today at school. He used the opportunity to talk with one of his friends about a popular game they both play. Elliott was asking his friend for advice on how to battle a boss he was struggling with in the game.
His friend suggested that he use *master bait. *
Elliott didn't have to go any further and I immediately understood what had happened. His teacher didn't understand the context, all they heard was *masterbate *being tossed back and forth.
Because as adults, we're pretty much all perverts on some level, they heard *masterbate *and not *master bait. *
Elliott was told something like *that's not appropriate to discuss while at school. *Something to that effect anyway. Elliott and his friend we're both very confused because they couldn't figure out how talking about using *master bait *was inappropriate.
The kids explained what they were talking about and the teachers, who soon realized the innocence of what they were saying but apparently didn't explain the misunderstanding.
Frankly, I'm not sure if it would have been appropriate for the teachers to have had that conversation without talking to the parents first but I don't think I would have been upset if they had. I would depend greatly on how they approached it.
Anyway, Elliott was telling me this story and as soon as he said *master bait, *I too heard *masterbate. *I knew that if the teachers were unfamiliar with what the boys were talking about, it would easily and understandably be misunderstood.
I told Elliott that his teachers thought he meant *masterbate *when he said *master ------- bait. *I sorta exaggerated the pause between the two words to help emphasis the difference.
Of course, now Elliott and Emmett both wanted an explanation for what *masterbate *meant and why it would be inappropriate to use that word in school.
That lead to a very awkward conversation that I bravely took on because I wanted them to understand what the teachers thought they had heard and why what they thought they had heard, was not appropriate to talk about at school. I wanted to make sure that I handled this in a way that was very *matter of fact.*
I didn't want them to associate anything like shame with it because it's important that they know what it means and that it's a normal, healthy human action.
I also made sure to add that this is a private thing and that no one else should be doing anything like that to them. I wanted to try and keep it as age and developmentally appropriate as possible. I know that things change as they get older but at this point in time, no one outside of their doctor should ever touch them in their private areas.
I was really proud of myself for addressing this in the moment and not throwing our family therapist under the bus by telling them that *we would talk about it at therapy tomorrow. *
The look on their faces was that of horror and I'm not sure if I made it worse by trying to address it but goddamnit, I tried. I very much uncomfortably tried.
That has to count for something.
All joking aside, who the fuck names something an inventory item *master bait *in a game that kids play?
