I woke up exhausted, but in a good mood. That mood carried me through until it came time to get Emmett in his shoes and socks. Lizze worked for quite some time with him on being able to tolerate his shoes and socks. Unfortunately, despite her best efforts and massive amounts of patience, we never resolved anything for more that a few minutes.
Emmett was okay with things until he got in the car and I began making the drive to school.
At this point he's freaking out, screaming and ripping his shoes off again. This lasted the entire trip to the school and I wasn't in the best place to deal with this.
When we got to school, I had to park the car because he wouldn't get out or put his shoe back on. It was already 8:30 am and I'm really beginning to stress out because I have a million things to do today.
I ended up being a bit more *gruff *than I wanted to and I put his shoe on and tied it, before leading him into the school. I wasn't mean or anything like that but I don't think Emmett sees it that way.
The poor kid was so stressed out but I walked him to his classroom and we spoke with his teacher about how things were going with his shoes and socks this morning. She assured him that she would be there to help him if he needed anything.
He went into the classroom on his own and did so without saying goodbye.
I know he feels that I forced him to go today and that I must not understand what he's experiencing. Lizze and I both did what we thought was the right thing to do but that doesn't prevent me from feeling absolutely horrible about this.
This whole shoes and socks thing is getting worse. I've no idea how to help him with this. We're doing every sensory related thing we can within our home and nothing seems to help. We've worked with OT for years on this and it's not making much of a difference.
I hate feeling like a monster for making Emmett go to school, even when his shoes and/or socks are making him miserable. I realize that he has to go to school but there has to be a better solution.
