I was chatting with people on the Lost and Tired Facebook page about #Autism related parenting stuff.
The conversation got me thinking and I wondered if anyone can relate?
I have a hard time remembering what life was like before Autism. I know I wasn’t always an Autism Dad but it feels like it at times.
Can any of you relate to this or is it just me?
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Last post I waxed poetic about like a book once read, or a tv show. Another person stated like a dream.
After contemplation however, what you are shining a light around is the fact that being the parent of a child or children with special needs requires us to narrow our field of vision. By that I mean we are so focused on the potential dangers and their own warning signs so that we can keep them safe that we rarely have time to ponder future events or past events. When that time does occasionally present itself, we are usually so spent we use it to collapse and hopefully regain enough strength for the next issue.
My wife spoke with a doctor a while back and his comments were that we, and I assume most parents of special needs kids, exhibit the signs of PTSD except for one thing. Ours is not post. Ours is ongoing. We and others in the autism community maintain a hypervigilant state to redirect the next bolting attempt, or meltdown, etc.
Just my thoughts on a Saturday morning about why anything beyond a week ago is ancient history for me, and I assume others in our community.
My kids are very spaced out in age. My two oldest are 18 and 21 and are both NT kiddos. My twins (one ASD, one NT) are 6 years old. I remember parenting my neurotypical kids when they were little and it was a very different parenting experience than that of parenting my 6 year old with ASD. I remember that my older kids actually responded to discipline, I never worried about sensory overload, meltdowns, and social awkwardness. My older two breezed through school and there were never any concerns. Parenting my 6 year old with ASD is SO much different. I have to plan out everything we do, communication with the school is on a daily basis, time outs and other methods of discipline are a waste of time and I spend playdates praying my ASD kiddo will actually engage in social interaction with his “friends”. Yes, I definitely remember what life was like before Autism and I have to laugh at the things that stressed me out back then!
I do. But that’s also a life before I became a mother and I don’t miss that at all.
yeah
Vaguely , seems like a dream somedays.
Like a tv show, or a story I read once.
NikkiSchwartzVB No, since I was born autistic.
NikkiSchwartzVB Lost_and_Tired What you are saying demonstrates IGNORANCE, as well as a lack of scientific literacy.
NikkiSchwartzVB Lost_and_Tired I have never had a “life before Autism.” I have always been Autistic. Autism is in the placenta.
My kids are very spaced out in age. My two oldest are 18 and 21 and are both NT kiddos. My twins (one ASD, one NT) are 6 years old. I remember parenting my neurotypical kids when they were little and it was a very different parenting experience than that of parenting my 6 year old with ASD. I remember that my older kids actually responded to discipline, I never worried about sensory overload, meltdowns, and social awkwardness. My older two breezed through school and there were never any concerns. Parenting my 6 year old with ASD is SO much different. I have to plan out everything we do, communication with the school is on a daily basis, time outs and other methods of discipline are a waste of time and I spend playdates praying my ASD kiddo will actually engage in social interaction with his “friends”. Yes, I definitely remember what life was like before Autism and I have to laugh at the things that stressed me out back then!
As a mother of four girls the oldest being sixteen..i can honestly say i have few recollections. I was barely twenty when my oldest was born. 🙂 I think that its a parenting traot on general however. Parenting in its many forms comes to define you. 🙂