How do you explain to your child with #Autism that they have #Autism?

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  • Post last modified:September 24, 2012

This is a very important topic.  This may or may not apply to you but if it does,  you’ll likely benefit from this #Autism Discussion.

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The question for today is,  have you had to explain to your child with #Autism, that they have #Autism?

If you have,  what did you say? How did it go?

This was posted via WordPress for Android, courtesy of Samsung’s Galaxy S III. Please forgive any typos. I do know how to spell but auto-correct hate me.

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Rob Gorski

Full time, work from home single Dad to my 3 amazing boys. Oh...and creator fo this blog. :-)
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Mikacollegegirl

@Lost_and_Tired I told my son out straight but I also told him that doesn't make him any different.

anansison

Here's a friend of mine who had the talk with one of her daughters.
  http://delirious-mom.blogspot.com/2012/08/birdie-
 

lostandtired

 @anansison Thanks a lot 🙂

kat13

My daughter had always been suspected in autism, but didn't get an official diagnosis until January of last year. On the top of that she was diagnosed with ADHD. She was 9 back then. I didn't know how to approach this subject with her for a long time as it seems. I was able to explain ADHD to her successfully almost right after the diagnosis since we decided to try medication. 
 
However, I had no clue how to even start conversation about autism with her. I asked several bloggers who were themselves autistic, and all recommended to tell your child about it sooner rather than waiting. 
 
So I decided to get some books that will help her learn some of the social skills with other kids (since it is her major weakness), and along the way looking for books, I found a book about famous people with autism. 
 
I waited for the right time, when she wasn't upset or overstimulated by anything. Sort of a clam state where I knew she could listen.
 
So finally last month, I sat down with her and we talked for about an hour. I started with the positive things about her. Then told her that everyone has its own weaknesses where she has strength. Gave her examples of her sister's and my weaknesses. Then told her what weaknesses she will be faced with, but also told her that I will teach her everything I can and we can work on those together.
 
We started reading from the positive book about all famous people with autism.  Right now we are about half way in that book. I can see that reading this book with her, she sees her diagnosis more like an opportunity to use her capabilities and not as a sickness, weakness, or disadvantage. And that is exactly what I want her to see it as. 

lauriemarie

 @kat13 
Can I ask what the name of the book /s you used? I have a 6 year old grandson who is autistic, aspergers, and a 4 year old grandson with autism to the point of him still eating baby food, still in a diaper, he doesn't talk-he will say a few words here and there. My daughter has explained to the oldest that the youngest has autism but she has never told the oldest. He is on meds and never asks why. I would appreciate any help you can give me. Thank  you.

kat13

 @lauriemarie Sure, Laurie. But don't worry about the little one, as long as he gets an early intervention (and all the support for you guys), he will progress. My daughter had only 10 words in her vocabulary at age 4, and she was only eating from the baby bottle, so I used to load that milk with tofu, yogurt, and baby food. It was even unpleasant to look at it, but that was the only way she would eat. And she had a picture schedule until she was in the 2nd grade. Later I used a "TODO" list for her at home that helped with simple tasks(including brushing teeth) and brought anxiety down.
 
I actually got a few books on which I can give some feedback. The book I mentioned that we started reading is "Different Like Me: My Book of Autism Heroes" by Elder, http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1843108151/ref=o… .
 
And I found first two on the list that are work better for my daughter because it provides visual support, but we just started on the first one:
 
1. "The Social Skills Picture Book Teaching play, emotion, and communication to children with autism",&nbsp ;http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1885477910/ref=oh_details_o03_s00_i03
 
2. "Social Skills Picture Book for High School and Beyond,"&nbsp ;http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1932565353/ref=oh_details_o03_s00_i02
 
3. When I got this one, I knew that would not be helpful to her at all as it just lists all of the social skills in the group. There are no visual examples, nor why those participial skill is important. So it will be more and a guide for me as a reminder of what to talk to her about and practice. "Social Rules for Kids-The Top 100 Social Rules Kids Need to Succeed "&nbsp ;http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1934575844/ref=oh_details_o03_s00_i04
 
4. And finally I got this book, but the topics it covers would be more appropriate for boys. Although, I can use a couple to go over with her. "A 5 Is Against the Law! Social Boundaries: Straight Up! An honest guide for teens and young adults"&nbsp ;http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1931282358/ref=oh_details_o03_s00_i00
 

mumof4wifeof1

I blogged about this here: http://mumof4wifeof1.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/telli… I kept it very casual, just dropped it into the conversation, and always portray it as a positive thing that he has aspergers. Has worked well for us

lostandtired

 @mumof4wifeof1 I agree. Keeping it positive is a great way to approach things like this. 

Brianne Lynn

I am struggling with this right now.  My 6 year old aspie thinks that it is ok to be friends with the aides that watch over recess instead of playing with the other kids.  I am at a loss as to how to explain to him that even though he might prefer adult interaction, he needs to play with kids his own age.  He is not getting the social interaction that he needs at school.  It really breaks my heart 🙁

kat13

 @Brianne Lynn My daughter had the same thing. She is 10 now and trying really to find common language with her peers, but it isn't that easy task. She took the social skills class that she found boring, and now we are reading social skills books with her and I try to help her by correcting her all the time and give her as much explanation as I can why certain things important.
 
This is the first year  where the school pulled the aides away completely (after a gradual decrease in time to promote her independence per our request). Just give him time, work with your school teachers and aide, and see what they think if he is becoming to dependent on them at all times. But I wouldn't recommend to interfere directly with your son, give him some time. 
 

lostandtired

 @Brianne Lynn Gavin was different. He prefers to play with people younger than he is. 

TinaMarieCrain

I have not actually set my boys down and told them but I wanted to know if they knew what autism was so I got out my video camera and here are the results.. .http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0YJxgWDNYk0&feature=share&list=UUaobfDzzSlqcFCmi1tgVD0Q

TinaMarieCrain

my boys are 9 and 8 years old

lostandtired

 @TinaMarieCrain @katrinamoody Thanks a lot for sharing your story 🙂