Gavin returns home at some point today. I would be lying if I said I wasn't a bit nervous about that.
It's really difficult because it's not that I don't want to see *him*, it's that the *behaviors* come with him. There isn't a way to separate the two.
I was speaking with my Mom tonight about this whole thing.
It's so hard to explain what this feels like. No matter what I do, I have to make a decision that will have such a huge impact on my entire family. It feels like Lizze and I have to choose between our children.
I know it's not nearly that simple and that there are few options left, however, it still feels wrong.
I know I sound like a scratched record but I've never been in a situation like this before. There's no question that we have to protect the best interests of the other boys and that we have done everything we could possibly do for Gavin, literally.
That said, as a parent, it feels like we're giving up. Logically I know that's not the case, but that doesn't help my broken heart. How much of parenting is based on *logic *anyway?
***Thanks for reading***
* -Lost and Tired*
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This was posted via WordPress for Android, courtesy of Samsung's Galaxy S III. Please forgive any typos. I do know how to spell but auto-correct is working against me.
