I have a confession to make. I'm completely and utterly overwhelmed. In the past three days we have several new challenges, Gavin and Elliott are both having seizures and Emmett has developed pneumonia. Elliott will be seen today for possible pneumonia as well.
This has all happened in the past two or three days alone.
If I had all the time in the world and all I had to do was physically care for my family, it would be overwhelming. It's literally like having three full time jobs without the benefit of a paycheck.
However, I have other responsibilities to worry about as well aside from the physical care. I have to keep the house from falling apart, fight the school system, deal with bill collectors, navigate all the various medical issues and make sure everyone gets the care they need. In my spare time, I do my best to provide for my family and keep up this blog.
It's like being tied to a dozen different horses and someone fires a gun. The horses get spooked and subsequently pull me in a dozen different directions at the same time.
As more and more piles on my plate, it's becoming much harder to maintain anything. I can't keep up with the house. I can't keep up with the yard or get the things needed to make the yard safer for the boys. This shouldn't have even been an issue because we were supposed to move. The theft of our van and being forced into a car payment has had a tremendous impact on us and has stopped the move to a new house and better neighborhood, dead in its tracks.
I just can't win for trying. I'm tired, overwhelmed, frustrated, angry and losing hope that things will one day get better for my family. I know I sound like a whiner but whatever. Right now that's the least of my worries.
I try really hard to remain positive but with sleepless nights and really sick special needs kids, it's getting harder to remain positive.
I'm done venting for now. Thanks for listening, I really appreciate it. :-)
***Thanks for reading***
* -Lost and Tired*
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Posted from WordPress for Android so please forgive any typos as auto-correct and I don't see eye to eye. :-)
