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My thoughts2 min read

The struggle

August 15, 2010

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Anyone versed in Autism already knows what a struggle Autism can be. Gavin just got home from his 2nd hospital stay in as many weeks. I went from frustrated with his behaviors to horrified he was in the psych unit to glad he is home. Since he arrived home yesterday I have gone all the way back to frustrated.

Gavin is trying and that's obvious. However, he is also back to telling me all his thoughts and incessantly talking. The tension between him and Elliott Richard could be cut with a knife. ER is glad Gavin is home but is frustrated at the same time. Gavin isn't the easiest kid to play with. Gavin is always easily frustrated and now is no different. ER is trying to connect on some level with Gavin and that seems to be impossible but that doesn't stop him from constantly trying.

Emmett John is not making a lot of progress. In fact Lizze and I noticed that he seems to only retain 2 words at a time. When he does learn a new word he no longer says the old word. It's like he's trading one word for another instead of retaining all he has learned. He is also becoming more physically aggressive. He hits Lizze and ER all the time now. Lizze has scratches on her face from EJ. ER keeps getting beaten by EJ as well. They are seemingly unprovoked "attacks". I think EJ is frustrated cause he cannot talk and so he lashes out.

EJ screams ALL THE TIME. ER screams with him when they are fighting (which is all the time as well). The screaming wears you down pretty quickly. I think part of our problem is the various and conflicting sensory needs. I haven't been able to figure out how to accommodate everyone at the same time yet. It's like helping one hinders another.

I used to work 80 weeks as a paramedic and it wasn't nearly as exhausting as these guys. It's like 3 full time jobs and no lunch breaks.

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